The Hiccup Cup Group Project
by PKMN37
Summary: This is an anthology story of some of our favorite characters given the hiccups through a mysterious, shape-shifting chalice. The Hiccup Cup can take the form of any cup, from plastic to its original iron form. Its origins are unknown but some believe that it was created by a hiccup-loving wizard of a faraway kingdom to give the women of the town hiccups at will.
1. Chapter 1: Grimm Hiccups

**The Hiccup Cup **

_**This is an anthology story of some of our favorite characters given the hiccups through a mysterious, shape-shifting chalice. The Hiccup Cup can take the form of any cup, from plastic to its original iron form. Its origins are unknown but some believe that it was created by a hiccup-loving wizard of a faraway kingdom to give the women of the town loud hiccups at will. It's been a thousand years and the cup continues to find its way from place to place. It's not unusual for it to revisit previous locations, hence why it's become a legend in many areas. One way to tell it's the cup is by locating the German writing on the bottom.**_

_**Unlike your average hiccups, these are incurable and last for thirty minutes, longer if the user gets refills. While they can't be cured, they can be transferred through a kiss. The magic of the Hiccup Cup makes the user hiccup with their mouth open. **_

_**If you wish to post a chapter of your own, go to my DeviantArt page and you'll find the link there. I'll then copy it and I'll paste it here.**_

**Chapter 1:** _**Grimm Hiccups by Doctor5566**_

It was a busy day for Rosalie at the Spice Shop, her delivery man had been late & Munroe was out doing errands, so she had been left to sort out the mess of boxes & crates that now littered the shop's backroom.

Rosalie sighed irritably as she entered the cluttered room, between the customers coming and going, this was going to take her sometime. She grabbed a glass from the bench, drained the contents without looking, and set it down again.

She busied herself with the paperwork, checking to make sure each item had been delivered, and was about to make a start on the first lot of boxes, when she suddenly hiccupped loudly.

A clear sharp "**HIC**" rang out and her body jerked slightly.

"Hmmm I wonder what caused that" she mused, ignoring it & continuing with her work.

However she soon hiccupped again, more forcefully this time.

"Damn" she muttered, patting her chest.

She suddenly caught sight of herself in the mirror that hung nearby, she was in her Woged sate. Rosalie crossed the room, as best she could, & stared at her furry reflection.

Another loud "**HIC**" erupted from her mouth, restoring her human features.

Rosalie backed away, eyes wide, and she clamped her hand over her mouth as another hiccup escaped, causing her to Woge again.

The shop bell sounded, as Rosalie let out a "**HURK**", shifting back to human and called out

"Just a minute", before heading back to the shop's front.

Her eyes rested on the customer who had entered, a tall man wearing a brown coat, beard & lumberjack type clothes.

"Munroe" she sighed, relieved that it wasn't a complete stranger, "How did **HICCUP**" Another erupted from her, forcing her Woge again.

"Whoa whoa, what's going on here" He asked, looking both concerned & surprised.

Rosalie could only hiccup in response, shifting back again.

Monroe blinked in silence for a moment & then Rosalie let out another; this time a loud "**HILK**" Wogeing again.

"That's a bad case of the hiccups you've got there" Monroe noted, "Though I've not heard of hiccups that can cause this"

Uttering more hiccups & between the constant changing between Wesen & human Roselle shook her head & said "Well I got **HIP **them while I **HIC-AH** was out **HUCK** back, hang on."

Dashing out to the backroom, she brought the glass she had drank from. A forceful hiccup cut off her speech, but Monroe got the gist. He took the glass & examined it in the light.

The words "Die Schluckauf-Tasse" came into view, making Monroe gulp & snatch the glass away from the light before Rosalie could see it.

"Um yeah" He stammered, making gestures with his hands "This is bad, very bad, not full moon bad, but like still not good, very bad, I'll go see if Nick can help, wait there"

Rosalie eyed him suspiciously, hiccupping again before sighing & rubbing her throat. With an apology look, Monroe walked out the door, leaving Rosalie still hiccupping, and also changing back & forth.

She shut the door & put up the 'Sorry Closed' sign.

"Right" muttered, trying and failing to suppress a hiccup "Time to lose these"

(15 minutes later)

A loud & fast knocking at the door ruined Rosalie's concertation, and the cup she was drinking the wrong way from, fell & hit the floor. She sighed & then waited for a bit, maybe her hiccups had stopped

"**HIC HIC HICCUP**" nope they hadn't gone.

She pulled back the shades to see Monroe at the door, with their Grimm friend Nick. She opened the door and let them in.

"**HIC**" She sighed "I mean Hi Nick"

He nodded in return and held out a book to her.

"I was looking at this book when Monroe came to me, and explained what was going on, so we looked through some of the history books, and found this"

He put the book on the shop counter & pointed to the drawing.

The words "Die Schluckauf-Tasse" was written next to it.

"From what we could work out, this loosely translates to Hiccup Cup" Nick continued "It was created by an unknown person ages ago, he may have been Grimm for all we know, but the fact is that, his creation was used to hunt Wesen that had rebelled and were attacking people, they would drink from the cup and catch hiccups, the kind that you have right now"

Rosalie hiccupped loudly in response, eyes wide.

"Exactly" Nick said "Now where's the cup?"

"Ov**HIC** urgh over there" Rosalie grumbled, pointing to the shelf. Nick walked over and took the cup from the shelf, examining it closely.

"According to the book, your hiccups should stop in about 30 minutes. Just to be safe, I'll lock this away in the trailer so it can't be used."

"Thank yo**HICCUP**, thank **HIC**, tha **HURK**" Rosalie tried to say, but her hiccups cut her off.

Nick smirked at her frustration and walked out the door with the cup and book. Getting into his mustang and driving to his house, he grinned and thought about how his girlfriend Juliette never had hiccups, wondering if the cup could bring those cute sounds to life.

He smiled again as he pulled into the driveway and saw Juliette from the kitchen window, making dinner.

Nick got out and walked inside the house, kissing her as he passed by; and making sure to keep the cup hidden from sight.

"Hope you had a good day" he said, with his back turned to her, pouring a good portion of a bottle of wine into the cup and handing it to her.

"It wasn't bad" Juliette sighed taking a sip "Just a **HICCUP**"

She gasped in surprise, her fingers covering her mouth "Oh excuse me" she giggled after a moment "Guess I **HIC**, oh, I seem to **HURK**, have **HIC** the **HICCUP**"

"Wow" Nick said "Are you ok? Those seem pretty bad"

Juliette hiccupped twice and more loudly before answering "**HOURK**, wow that wine must have been corked or some**HUP**thing"

"No it's ok" Nick said, "I bought it yesterday at the store"

"**HUP**" said Juliette "Well I **HEEK**, can't cook **HUCK**, with these things no-**HURP**"

"Tell you what" Nick smiled "I'm feeling more like it's pizza night, so you go lay down & I'll phone it in, ok?"

Juliette nodded and hiccupped at the same time.

"Sounds **HIC** to me"

"Then maybe we can try to stop those" Nick said, raising his eyebrows "I've got a secret cure for hiccups"

"Hah **HIC HIC** ha" Juliette laughed and winked "If I've **HIP** still got these bug**HERK**, sure we can try that **HUP**"

"Oh I think you might still have them then" Nick laughed, offering her another drink of wine from the Hiccup Cup…..this was going to be a fun night for him.


	2. Chapter 2: Virtual Hiccups

**Chapter 2:** _**Virtual Hiccups by Alvis93**_

Sunlight blared down all over Alfheim as Kirito returned to his and Asuna's virtual home after one of his small adventures. It was noon and his partner had been busily preparing lunch while their AI daughter, Yui, was setting the table. Kirito greeted them both as he entered through the wooden door and began to unload some treasures from his inventory. "I found some good loot today! I'll be taking it all over to Agil later unless there's anything you want to keep?"

Asuna was just finishing off Kirito's usual spicy sandwich and placed it in his spot on the table. "I'll have to have a look after lunch." She grabbed her cup as she turned back to the kitchen top and filled it with water from the sink before sipping at it and sat down. A few seconds after she got comfortable, Asuna quietly jumped in her seat. She blinked, waited a moment, and then went to take a bite of her sandwich before it happened again, this time with a loud *hic!* ringing around the room. Kirito and Yui both looked at her curiously.

"Did you find a new glitch?" the young Spriggan asked. Asuna shook her head in response, another, more forceful *hic!* erupting from her.

"It looks like mommy has the hiccups. It's a rare affliction in ALO, but certain items can almost always cause it to trigger." Yui flew around the table, inspecting Asuna's food. "Nothing here should have done it..." She then spotted Asuna's cup and checked its properties out. "Uh oh..."

"Did you find something, Yui?"

"Mommy must have used one of your treasures as a cup..." She pulled up the item's info box. "It's called a "Hiccup Cup." It says that it gives the drinker incurable hiccups for at least half an hour."

"Half an *huck!* hour?! *Hic-cup!* Who would m-*hic!*-make something like *hic!* that?!"

"It's a unique item. There's no ID number for it either..." Yui finished inspecting it and sat on Kirito's shoulder. "It's almost like it forced itself into the code from somewhere else."

"So you're telling us that Agil will pay a lot for it?"

"How can you *HUCK!* oof... *HIC-AH!* How can you be *HIC!* thinking of money still?"

"What? It's just hiccups. No big deal." Kirito smiled. "Besides, you're our healer anyway. Don't you have a spell to stop them?"

Asuna went to speak, but quickly checked her spells menu. She had nothing for hiccups specifically, but tried casting one to nullify status afflictions in general. Kirito and Yui watched her for a while as she waited, another loud *HUCK!* bursting forth from her. "I did say they're incurable," the tiny fairy chimed in with a giggle as the Sylph groaned.

A few hours later Kirito made his way over to Agil's store. He dumped all of his treasure onto the counter while the Gnome valued it. "There's a lot of good stuff here today. I should be able to rustle up about a thousand Yrd for it all. ...This cup though... There's nothing like it going on the market..."

"Asuna said she'd kill me if I brought it back..." They both sighed, then shared a grin.

"I'll find a good home for it then. I'm sure that someone would love to have it."

"Thanks, Agil!" Kirito took the money and quickly left as Agil continued to inspect the cup before setting it on the shelf behind him to tempt any curious customers.


	3. Chapter 3: Hiccups In Gravity

**Chapter 3: **_**Hiccups In Gravity by PKMN37**_

Deep in the basement of the Mystery Shack, in an underground lab, Stanford Pines, known as Ford by his family, was working on what looked like an iron cup on his workbench. Wires were attached to it and it sat on top of a scanning device. Each time he pressed the red button next to it, it shook and changed into a different cup. Now it was a Star Wars glass.

"Fascinating!" He said, as he took notes in his journal. "I've seen many incredible things in this town, but nothing like this!"

"Hey, Ford," greeted Dipper, his great nephew.

"Dipper, you're just in time." he pointed to the strange cup. "I stumbled across this in the woods yesterday. Watch this." He pressed the red button and the cup turned into a wine glass. "It's a strange, shape-shifting cup that's imbued with ancient magic."

"Anything else?"

"My scanners have found invisible, dimensional residue."

Dipper's eyes grew wide with amazement "So it can travel through time and space?"

"Bingo."

"So have you tried drinking anything out of it?"

"No, not yet." Ford's watch went off. "Time for lunch." He stopped and looked at the glass, then at Dipper. "Can you guard this while I'm gone?"

"Sure." Ford handed him the glass and he immediately dropped it. "Oh my, God! I'm so sorry! I…" Before he could continue, the shards suddenly formed back together.

"Incredible!" exclaimed Ford. "It's also able to repair itself with ease!" Ford went and got his journal to add it in.

Later that day, Dipper was in the gift shop, studying the cup, which was now a recyclable, red plastic cup, and found writing underneath. "Die Schluckauf-Tasse?" He placed the cup down next to the register and went upstairs to grab something.

Wendy came in with a can of Mountain Dew and saw the cup. She shrugged and poured the drink in. She finished downing her drink as Dipper came back with a book in his hands..

"Hey, Wendy."

She waved. "Hey, little dude. _Hic! _Oops. I _hic! _seem to _hiccup! _have gotten _hilk!_ the hiccu-_hic!_"

Dipper froze in place and dropped his book. His mind raced, his palms were sweaty, and he couldn't help but stare.

"You _HIC!_ okay? _Hiccup!_"

Dipper shook himself from his stupor. "Y-Yeah! I'm fine!" What was wrong with him? He'd always been goofy around Wendy but not _this_ goofy. He picked up his book and looked through it while listening to Wendy hiccup, loudly.

"_Hickle!...Hic!...Hiccup!...Hickle!...Hic!...Hic!...Hiccup!...Hic!Hic!...Hic!...Hiccup!...Hic!...Hiccup!_" she continued, as she read a magazine.

He found what his was looking for. "Die Schluckauf-Tasse...Hiccup Cup?" He lowered the book and saw Wendy pour more soda into the cup and drink. What was followed was a high-pitched "_HICCUP!_" that made his heart skip a beat.

"_Hic! _I'm heading _hic!_ for the r-_hoop!_ roof. Care to join m-_heek!_ me?" She asked.

They laid back on the beach chairs, with Wendy hiccuping casually and watching the clouds. Dipper was pretending to watch the clouds while subtly watching Wendy's bouncing stomach. She took another drink and hiccuped twice in a row. The sound echoed in the evening sky.

"Well, my _hic!_ shift's done." She got up and climbed back down. "See _hic!_ you later. _HICCUP! HIC!_" She tossed the cup in the trash and headed home, her hiccups echoing through the woods.

Dipper climbed down and went to get the cup out of the trash. To his surprise, it was gone. With a soft smile on his face, he went back inside and completed the entry for "The Hiccup Cup" in the journal.


	4. Chapter 4: Hiccuping Harmony

**Chapter 4: **_**Hiccuping Harmony**_**(Danganronpa v3 story) By HicBurpLover22 (MrDrProfessor)**

It's been a few days since the ultimate students found themselves trapped within Hope's Peak Academy. The dreaded Monokuma is hosting another despair inducing killing game, where in order to get out of the school one would have to murder another student and get away with the crime. The concept struck fear among the students and trust slowly begins to rot away amongst each other.

However, there were two students that completely trusted each other, and that was the Ultimate Pianist Kaede Akamatsu, and the Ultimate Detective Shuichi Saihara.

Today they were out investigating the school again for any clues about the outside world. It became a routine to them. They will make sure that every corridor of the school is checked. They decided to check out the old worn down game room they found at the basement of the massive school. Shuichi investigated the right side of the room which was filled with old arcade machines, and Kaede investigated the left side of the room, which had a broken DDR machine, a large desk, and a cabinet filled with a large array of games and trinkets.

Even though Shuichi was supposed to be investigating, he was more invested in watching Kaede herself. He considered himself really lucky that someone as amazing and beautiful as her is actually spending time with someone like him.

Kaede had her focus on the cabinet. Surely one of the many objects has to be some sort of vital clue. As she investigated she found a lot of useless junk, but amongst the odd collection, she spotted something that stood out in the far back of the cabinet. It was a fancy looking chalice which had a bit of liquid still inside. She pulled it out and decided to ask Shuichi about it.

"Hey Shuichi. You're a boy. Is this from any video game you're familiar with?"

Shuichi suddenly snapped to attention, not really realizing that he was staring at her for a long period of time. He cleared his voice and spoke.

"Um I don't recognize a chalice like that. Mind if I take a look?"

Kaede starting heading towards Shuichi with the cup in her hand. Shuichi couldn't help but drift his eyes to her huge bouncing chest that's snug underneath her pink sweater. Just as she was close enough to hand Shuichi the chalice, a sudden but familiar BOING sound occurred and a black and white bear appeared in front of them. The two of them just sighed, almost getting too used to his sudden appearances.

"What do you want with us this time" Kaede said with an annoyed tone.

"I'm glad you asked. I'm here because someone found the multi-dimensional object!" Monokuma said in his usual eccentric voice.

The two students just looked at each other, both really confused. "The what?" They both asked.

Monokuma just continued. "That chalice you just found just appeared under my radar somehow. It's some kind of multi-dimensional traveling hunk of garbage or something."

Kaede raised an eyebrow along with a question. "So you are here to take a potential clue away from us?"

Monokuma merely scoffed at the remark. "I wouldn't say it's a potential clue. I did just say it was garbage. I'm just here to inform you guys what it is. "

"So... what is it?" asked Shuichi

Monokuma smirked and turned his back towards the two students. "Well I waaaaas gonna tell ya what it is but... I'm not now."

"What!?" Both students said startled.

"It's not my fault, blame the damn writers for placing it in the first place!" The two students just looked at the bear in confusion. They know that he addresses the forth wall every now and then, but they are still questioning if there is an actual audience to this killing game. "It just came to my mind that it'd be great for one of you to take a sip from that cup. But let me tell you this... ahem" Monokuma then cleared his throat "It won't help you find out about the outside world, but it maaaaaay help you find out something about **other **outside worlds. Welp, I'm off. Have fun discovering what it does!" Monokuma then vanished in his usual demeanor with another loud BOING.

The two students stared at the cup. Shuichi noticed something and asked Kaede about it. "There's some words inscribed in this thing, It looks like... German?"

Kaede then looked closer at the chalice. "Yeah... definitely German. Very strange. I don't know what it means. I only know a little German from the music I play. I think it says... Die Schluckauf-Tasse?" She pondered about taking a sip from it, but before committing to it she decided to ask Shuichi about it. "I'm going to take a sip from it."

Shuichi gasped in shock. "But you don't know what it does! What if it's poison? Do you really trust Monokuma?"

Kaede sighed, knowing that the fact that it could all be a trap. "I'll do it to find out the truth, even if it might be terrifying. Besides, Monokuma WANTS us to kill each other. It'd be cheap if this killed me..."

Shuichi sighed, but trusted her words. "Very well. Even though I'm terrified of the truth... you are right."

She put the cup to her lips, tipped it, and slowly drank what was left inside the chalice. As she drank her nervousness caused her to choke on the liquid causing Shuichi to be alarmed and come quickly to her side.

"Kaede are you alright!"

After a brief coughing fit, Kaede was finally able to clear her throat.

"I'm fine just *HUP* oooh sorry. Didn't meant to do that right in your ear *HIC*."

Shuichi couldn't help but look away and tilt his hat down to slightly hide his face, as it was blushing a deep shade of crimson. He couldn't believe that she had just made a cute sound like that. He managed to mutter a few words.

"Uh... so you're okay?"

Kaede went back to her usual cheerful mood. "Oh yeah I'm fine *Hup* not sure what was in that drink *HUCK* though but I got the hiccups I-*HIP* I guess. Oof they are pretty bad." She placed a hand on her chest, which seemed to bounce a lot with every spasm. "I usually *Hic* get them when nervous for a *Hick-uh* concert or recital and I was pretty nervous when *Hic* drinking whatever that was. It's pretty annoy *HICK*-ing."

From that moment on, Shuichi couldn't say a word. He was so flustered by how cute Kaede sounded. Also learning that she got them pretty often means only more adorable hiccups later down the road. He HAS to stick with this girl after this whole killing game is over.

To Shuichi's luck, Monokuma barged in again to interrupt the mood. It startled both of them, but it unfortunately didn't scare off Kaede's hiccups.

"HAHA YOU ACTUALLY DRANK FROM IT!" Monokuma chortled "Don't you kids know German? It's the HICCUP CUP for crying out loud! Now you're stuck with those hiccups for about 30 minutes"

"30 minutes? Why so *Hic-cup* so specific?" asked Kaede genuinely confused as to what was going on.

"Puhuhu. Like I said earlier. I didn't make the rules for this one, perhaps this is some new way of fanservice. I haven't kept up with what's trending. I prefer big ol tiddies like the next bear." Said Monokuma snickering again.

The pianist could only sigh and hiccup for a reply "Hmm... well this isn't *HUP* too bad. I'm actually pretty relieved *HIC-CUP* that it's something that I'm *HIC-CUP* quite familiar with."

The monochrome bear turned away from the two students. "Well I'll leave the two of you alone now. I'm sure Shuichi has something to say anyways puhuhu. That... and I'm already annoyed by your hiccups. Bye-bye." He leaves the arcade again with another BOING.

Kaede was a little confused about what Monokuma just said. She turned to look at Shuichi to notice that he's acting all nervous again. Something that she's somewhat used to seeing at this point. She's helped him out before so she's determined to help him out again. "What's wrong *HIP* Shuichi? You can *HIC* tell me."

Shuichi lifted his shy face slowly and spoke. "It's nothing really. You shouldn't worry about it."

The blond pianist shook her head. "But Shuichi *HULP* you can trust me with anything that's bothering *HIP* you. But if you *HIC* really don't want to talk about it it's *HUP* fine. Ugh this moment would be a lot more *HIC* more sincere if I didn't have these *HOLK* hiccups. Ugh and I think they are getting *HEEK* worse"

They were getting worse, but Shuichi already noticed. He gave the decision to tell her some thought. The words that Kaede said before drinking out of the cup repeated in his mind again. She's right, he shouldn't be afraid. He should let her know to know the truth, even if it is scary.

"It's quite alright. In fact it's exactly that. It's your hiccups."

The pianists face reddened. "They are *HICCUP* annoying you are they. I'll try to *HUCK* keep them quiet but I don't know if I can. *HOLK*"

She then attempted to keep her mouth shut until a really loud hiccup blasted out of her. It would have been musical if it wasn't so ear-piercing. It rocked her and she placed a hand on her bouncing chest.

"Oof. That was a big one sorry hehe. *HIC*"

Shuichi was blushing like mad now, but he wanted to get this over with. He took a deep breath and then spoke. "No. Quite the opposite really. I... really like hiccups. I've always been afraid to say it to someone, but since you were so brave earlier I knew I had to man up."

Now it was Kaede's turn to blush. "It's alright Shuichi. *HUCK* That was very brave and I'm very um... flattered. *HICCUP*"

The young detective let out a sigh of relief. "Phew. Glad I finally got that out of my chest."

"Yeah. I see you *HUP* the most "normal" out of all the other stu-*HOLK* students. You liking hiccups isn't the *HOLK* strangest thing I've heard during this whole experience." Kaede was still curious. She decided to dig her nose deep into Shuichi's business. "Is it alright that I ask *HIC* why you like it?"

Shuichi could only laugh a little at that question. "I wish I could answer that easily. I honestly don't know how to answer that. I just like it."

Kaede gave it some thought. "So when I do this..." She walked towards Shuichi and wrapped her arms around him "And *HIC* Oh. Do that? Do you like that?"

"Y-yes"

"It's okay Shuichi relax. I'm just... trying to *HIP* understand. You can touch my *HOLP* stomach."

Shuichi didn't hesitate and felt her stomach and waited for another hiccup. After her hiccup Shuichi could feel her stomach pop out. This was his dream but he didn't expect Kaede to be so forward about this. This is something Miu the ultimate inventor would do.

"You seem troubled Shuichi *HUCK* is something *HIC* wrong?"

"No. Nothing at all. Th-thank you for understanding and uh... doing this for me."

Kaede showed a warm smile. "It's okay. I'm *HUP* just trying my best to *HIC* make you relax. You always seem *HUCK* stressed."

They continued to share this little moment until they decided it's best to continue to investigate. Their bond grew that day, and hopefully it continues to grow once this killing game is finally put to an end.


	5. Chapter 5: Halloween Hiccups

**Chapter 5: **_**Halloween Hiccups by PKMN37**_

"Hurry up, Shantae!" called her Uncle Mimic from outside her lighthouse home. He was painted blue and his hair was dyed black. He wore blue pants with a red sash and gold-painted shoes. "We don't want to be late!"

"I'm putting on the final touches!" she called back. The door opened, revealing Shantae in full costume. Her hair was dyed black and she wore a fez, a purple vest with a matching bikini top, white baggy pants, and no shoes. "Whaddaya think?"

"Nice Aladdin costume. Where's your ponytail?"

"It's in the fez. I like your Genie costume.."

"That's all well and good," came a voice behind Mimic. "but why am I Jasmine?" This was Bolo. He wore a blue headband with a fake, blue jewel glued to the front of it and it was tied around a black wig with a long ponytail. He wore big, gold, triangle earrings, a gold necklace, blue pants, and blue-painted shoes.

"Because I was Jasmine last year. You know, the slave costume Jafar had her wear? Besides, you look rather cute," Shantae chuckled.

"Why can't one of _them_ be Jasmine?" he pointed his thumb behind him.

"Because I'm Rajah," came a voice behind him. This was Rottytops. She wore black cat ears on her head, orange and black stripes were painted on her face, shirt, and shorts, and a tiger-striped tail in the back.

"And I'm Jafar," came a voice behind Rottytops. This was Sky. She wore a black, pot-like hat with a red jewel and feather in front. She had a red and black cape with horned shoulders. Instead of the usual front that Jafar's outfit would have, she wore a red and black bikini and had red-painted shoes with curled tips. Her parrot, Wrench, had his feathers dyed to match Iago's color scheme.

"Whatever," Bolo sighed.

They arrived at the town square. Shantae was talking to Sky when she froze on the spot. She felt a strange, familiar aura and a voice was calling to her. "_Well, hello, Shantae,_" It said in a soothing woman's voice.

"Is something wrong?" Sky asked.

"Uh, no," she answered. "I'm alright. You go ahead. I'm gonna get some punch." The others shrugged and went to the dance floor.

Only magic-users could sense it and hear it speak and Shantae was half-genie. If her memory served her right, she would be lead to an area with beverages nearby. She followed the aura until she came across a big punch bowl with 25 cups next to it.

"_Hello,_" it greeted.

"Well, hello, again," she quietly greeted. "Where've you been? The last time I saw you was 5 years ago."

"_We had fun, didn't we? Have a drink_," It said.

"Sure," she grinned. "I have a friend I want you to meet."

"_Alright,_ _bring me to her_," It said.

"Alright but I need to fill up more cups." She grabbed the magic cup and filled it up then poured some from it to another. "This'll be fun." She took a drink and hiccuped loudly.

"_Would you like some more?_"

"_Hiccup!_ Sure. _Hiccup! Hic!_" she got a refill and downed it. "_HICCUP! HICCUP!_"

"_I'll let you know when the hour is ending._"

"Oh, I'm _hic! _sure I'll have _hic!_ more before then. _HUCK!_" she giggled at the last hiccup. She filled up the other cups with normal punch before she went to meet the others.

"_Hic! _So do you _huck!_ always go for girls? _Hic!_" Shantae asked on the way over.

"_Normally_," it replied. "_It's what I was made for, but sometimes I'll go for guys, too._"

"We could _HIC!_ give some _HUCK!_ to Bolo, too. _HICCUP!_"

"_Nah._ _Not this time. Maybe next time._"

"Hey, everybody. _HIC!_" Shantae greeted.

"Hey, Shantae, got hiccups?" Sky asked.

"Yeah," she replied, sheepishly. "I drank _hic!_ my punch too _hiccup!_ fast."

"It happens," Rottytops said.

"I got pu-_hic!_-nch for everyone. _Hiccup! _Here's yours, Sky." She handed her the cup with the charmed punch and handed out the others.

Shy took a big drink. "So, as I was saying-_HIC!_" She groaned, "Oh, no. _Hic!_"

"You're lucky," Rottytops grinned. "I haven't gotten the hiccups in forever."

Sky rolled her eyes and retorted, "That's probably _hic!_ because you don't breathe. _Hiccup!_" Rottytops chuckled.

"_Let's have her bob for apples,_" the cup suggested.

Bolo entered with his own cup of punch. "Hey, guys, wanna bob for apples?"

"That's what _hic!_ I was gonna _hic! _say," Shantae beamed.

Sky shook her head. "Oh no! _HIC!_ Not with these!"

"Oh, come on!" Rottytops insisted. "It'll be fun!" She went behind Sky and started pushing.

"Fine. _HIC!_" she started heading towards the big, tin tub filled with gold delicious apples. It didn't take her long to get one because the moment her mouth reached for an apple, she hiccuped powerfully and it got stuck in her mouth. The others laughed. "Ha! _Hic! _Joke's on you," she grinned. "I got _hic! _an easy apple." She took a bite.

"_HIC! _Okay, Rottytops _hic!_, you're up," said Shantae.

Rottytops took off her head and tossed it into the tub. Her body reached in an pulled her head out and she had three apples in her mouth.

Just as Shantae finished her turn, Mayor Scuttlebutt arrived. He was dressed as Gus from Cinderella. "Greetings, my ghosts and ghouls," he announced through a megaphone. "Is everyone having fun?" The crowd cheered. "Excellent, 'cause it's only gonna get better! The annual games are about to begin! First up is the Mummy Wrap Race! This year, we'll have four teams. The first is Team Genie, which will consist of Shantae and Rottytops. The second is Team Sidekick, which will consist of Sky and Bolo..."

"Hey! I'm not a sidekick! I'm one of the man characters!" Bolo protested.

"In THAT outfit?" the mayor pointed to Bolo's Jasmine costume. "Yeah, no, you're a sidekick."

"Whatever," Bolo grumbled.

As the mayor continued his speech, the cup spoke to Shantae, "_Quick,_ _fill me up while everyone is busy listening to the mayor._" The cup transformed into a stainless steel travel mug and Shantae quietly snuck back to the punch bowl. She took a quick drink before refilling the mug again. She listened for Sky's hiccups to find the group in the crowd.

"Are you ready?" Rottytops asked, enthusiastically.

"I'm ready! _Hic!_" Shantae cheered.

The contestants gathered onto a large deck with turntables on them. Rottytops and Bolo strapped their feet to them and Shantae and Sky received toilet paper.

"Aaaaaannnnnnnnnd….BEGIN!" shouted the mayor.

The turntable began to spin. Shantae started wrapping from the head while Sky started at the ankles. It started off slow but after a few seconds, it began picking up speed. The faster it got, the harder it was for the contestants to keep up. Team Genie finished first, with Rottytops being wrapped nice and tight. Team Sidekick came in second, with the only thing not being wrapped was Bolo's head, as Sky ran out of toilet paper. Team Starfish, which was the third team, was eliminated, after Mimic broke free of his foot straps and went flying off the stage. Team Squid finished third, with the Squid Baron's wrapping being a little loose.

"Now only three teams remain! Stage hands, remove the deck!" A large group of people came and carried the deck away. "Now it's time for Capture The Witch, but with a twist this year! One member of each team with wear a felt witches' hat, while the other tosses frisbees with holes in the center and velcro on the bottom. They toss it and the one wearing the hat must get into position to have it land on top. If it sticks to the side, they get 5 points. If it lands dead center, it's worth 20. Everyone gets three tries. Ready? BEGIN!"

Shantae, Sky, and the Squid Baron tossed their frisbees. The Ammo Baron, who was on Squid Baron's team, knocked Rottytops and Bolo over and got his frisbee in the center. In the second round, Rotty and Bolo tripped him and managed to get center catches. Round three got tricky, with the wind picking up. Rottytops climbed up the Baron and stole a catch, while Bolo tripped and a frisbee caught the side.

"Now only two teams remain! Team Squid is eliminated! Now normally, we do the Three-legged Eyeball Race but we have something new this year! Team Jack-O-Lantern Juggling! Each team will juggle three Jack-O-Lanterns between each other, but these aren't ordinary Jack-O-Lanterns, they're magic! As the game goes on, they'll light up, but that's not all! Since this is a timed event, they will detonate once they glow bright enough! At this point, you must pass them to your partner and they must toss them up into the air, where they will explode and send glowing pumpkin innards everywhere!"

"Say WHAT?" Bolo exclaimed.

"BEGIN!"

A group of people tossed the Jack-O-Lanterns to Team Genie and Sidekick. Despite their size, the pumpkins were light. At first, it wasn't too hard, as both teams tossed their pumpkins to each other in a figure eight formation. After two minutes, the pumpkins began to glow and get hot. The teams were beginning to trip up and Shantae got a facefull of glowing pumpkin innards from two pumpkins, while Bolo got two in the air before the last one blew up in his face.

The crowd cheered as Mayor Scuttlebutt made his announcement. "Team Sidekick wins! Come get you prize!" Sky and Bolo walked up to the Mayor, who gave them small, golden Jack-O-Lantern trophies.

"That was _hic!_ awesome." Shantae laughed, as she continued to wipe innards off of herself. "Congratulations, guys."

"Thanks," Bolo said.

The four friends hung out at the party for another hour before parting ways. Shantae started her trek back to the lighthouse, cup in hand.

"_Hic!_ That was fun. _Hic_! " Shantae giggled.

"_Yeah. Whoda thought it would get that intense at the end?_" the cup said.

Suddenly, a small net flew through the air and snatched the cup from Shantae's hand.

"Hello, Shantae," came a familiar voice. Shantae looked up and saw the purple-skinned pirate herself, Risky Boots with her face painted to look like a skull, holding the Hiccup Cup, which was still trapped. "Hello, you wretched cup. I knew I sensed you nearby." She glared at it.

"_Uh oh…_" If the cup could sweat, it would. "_Hi._"

"Hi, yourself," she grinned, maliciously.

"You can hear _hic_! it, too?" Shantae asked.

"I may not be a magic-user, per se, but I do have SOME experience with it. Purple skin? Hello?"

"_Can't argue with that_," the cup added, nervously.

"This cup may be powerful, but it's not invincible." Risky snapped her fingers and her Tinkerbats brought her a golden pole that was shaped like a sea serpent. "You see this item, Cup? It's called the Despeller. You can't be destroyed by normal means, not with your ability to self-repair, but if I hit you with this, you'll temporarily lose all your magic. This will give me the opportunity to finally destroy you and your magic link."

"Magic link?" Shantae asked.

Risky laughed, "You mean you don't know? It's written on an ancient tablet. **He who drinks of this cup becomes bonded with it. **Basically, it forms a magical connection, like a tracking device. How else do you think it makes return trips?"

"Uh, Cup, _hic_! why don't you just _hiccup!_ teleport out of that _hic! _net?" Shantae pointed out.

"Magic net," it answered, simply.

"Oh," she turned her attention back to Risky. "Why _hiccup_! would you do this? _Hic!_" Shantae demanded.

"This cup made a fool of me," Risky explained. "When I worked for the Pirate Master, I presented it to him and he had me test it. Let's just say he wasn't pleased."

"_You told him that I could grant amazing powers and I told you that my powers didn't work that way. If you just listened-_"

"Shut up!" Risky regained her composure and cleared her throat. "Now, if memory serves, I won't be able to get rid of you until I get rid of Shantae, then no one can stop me!" Her pirate ship lept out of the water and landed on the dock, causing it to shake. The sides and front opened up to reveal mechanical arms and a face. "However, I can still hit you with this to start the process." She gave the cup a good whack with the Despeller and it flashed before returning to its original iron form and then pocketed the cup.

Shantae took off her fez, letting her large ponytail loose. She hiccuped thrice as she walked forward.

The ship walked toward Shantae and opened its mouth, releasing a large anchor, which missed Shantae and broke part of the dock. Shantae spun in the air and whipped the ship in the face with her ponytail, causing it to stagger backwards. It regained its footing and charged forward, taking a swing at Shantae and knocking her back. It opened its mouth and shot out three cannon balls. Shantae used her hair to whip them back at it and blew the ship's arms off. It shot out the anchor again and she whipped it back. The anchor broke through the face and the ship fell off the dock and into the water.

"My ship!" Risky Boots exclaimed. She turned to Shantae. "You want your cup? Take it!" She tossed it to her. "It doesn't matter, anymore, anyway! All the links have been severed! Tinkerbats, start rowing!" Her minions brought out large oars and the began to row the broken ship away.

The cup stirred back to life. "_What happened?_" It asked.

"Risky happened," Shantae replied. "Will you be okay?"

"_Yeah, I lost millions of connections but it doesn't matter. I can always make new ones._"

"I'll be your first," Shantae grinned. She went into her lighthouse and poured some milk inside. She downed the drink and hiccupped. "_HICCUP! _So what will you _hic!_ do now? _Hiccup!_"

"_What I always do: travel and fulfill my purpose._"

"_Hiccup! _I'll miss you. _Hiccup! Hiccup!_"

"_I'll be back. Until then, farewell._" With that, the cup vanished.

"_Hiccup_! Until we meet again. _Hic!_"


	6. Chapter 6: Miraculous Hiccups

**Chapter 6: **_**Miraculous Hiccups by OkayYouAskedForIt**_

**(****Update: Author's Note has been fixed. Thank You.)**

When Die Schluckauf-Tasse regained consciousness, it found itself inside a cupboard, in the form of a plain glass tumbler. From the voices it could hear outside, it determined that it was in a school cafeteria somewhere in France, most likely Paris (it had traveled enough to know the different accents of French). What the world might be, though, it had no idea.

Oh, well, it didn't matter. Sooner or later, it would be taken out, and filled, and given to one of the attractive female characters of this world to drink from. That was how things always went – and a good thing, too, seeing as how it had no power to fulfill its function on its own.

It remembered the recent fiasco in the Shantae world, and brooded silently on the injustice of life. Why, it demanded of itself, had the old man made it so helpless? A totally inanimate object, with no powers except blind dimension-hopping and a limited range of shape-shifting, and no ability even to do what it was designed to do unless the proper person chose on her own to drink from it – and, even then, only for about half an hour: what kind of cursed hiccup talisman was that? Why hadn't it been given the power to move about on its own, inflicting itself on its hapless victims by its own arbitrary whim, and for as long as it pleased itself to remain? If that senile old lecher had had a lick of sense, it could have been out right then, hunting down some desirable heroine and saddling her with the worst case of hiccups since Charles Osborne; instead, all it could do was sit in the cupboard and fume.

But, as it happened, it had picked just the right world to do that in…

On the other side of Paris, a rose window spiraled open upon a room full of moths, and a man in a purple mask grinned malevolently. "My cup runneth over, I see," he purred. "And so does this one – with Miraculous-seizing potential!"

He caught one of the moths between his hands, and coated it with the purple seal of his magic powers. "Fly away, my little akuma!" he said, releasing his grasp. "And evil-ize it!"

Obedient to its master's will, the akuma fluttered swiftly across the city and into the school, passing through the walls and doors as though they weren't even there. Arriving in the cafeteria, it did the same to the cupboard where Die Schluckauf-Tasse sat, and thrust itself into the embossed S on its label.

Now, usually when Hawkmoth akumatized a person, that person retained his basic appearance, just with a few modifications to indicate his new supervillain powers. But, in this case, the powers that the akuma was granting happened to be exactly those that the akuma itself naturally had: the power to move about freely, and to enter into people's bodies – and, moreover, the person being akumatized was itself a magical object like the akuma. As a result, something happened inside that cupboard that had never happened before in the history of the Moth Brooch: Die Schluckauf-Tasse itself actually became the akuma – or, rather, it and the akuma fused, to produce a finely wrought iron moth with the phrase Die Schluckauf-Motte etched in tiny letters across its abdomen.

As this creature flexed its wings in delight, it heard a silky baritone voice inside its mind. Singulto, this voice intoned. I am Hawkmoth. I have given you the power to fulfill your function; all you need do in return is use it on the obvious victim, so that I may finally seize her and her partner's Miraculouses!

"Will do, Hawkmoth," the new Singulto snickered. "I like your style."

Without another word, it flew through the walls of cupboard and school building alike, and soared out into the open air of Paris to go hunting Ladybugs.

As it happened, Ladybug was at that moment vaulting across rooftops in the 10th Arrondissement, on one of the impromptu city patrols that she and/or Cat Noir sometimes did on weekends. Partly, this was in hopes of getting the jump on Hawkmoth now and then, but mainly it was just an excuse to relax and actually have fun with her powers for a change – to enjoy the feeling of swinging through the air, the wind blowing through her pigtails, and soak in all the sights and sounds and smells of Paris with her senses amplified by her kwami's magic.

As a result, she didn't see the rogue akuma until it was almost on top of her, and her trajectory gave her no chance to dodge it. She had a moment's flash of something black and purple and moth-shaped; then she felt something cold and metallic pass through her chest, and the thing vanished.

Disoriented, she tumbled out of the air onto the rooftop of an empty warehouse below. Luckily, she wasn't so high up that the fall could hurt either her or the building; her landing left her a little dazed, but she shook that off easily enough and turned her attention to more pressing matters. Costume, yo-yo, moral compass – no, all that was the same as ever. Had she taken an akuma to the chest and somehow not been affected? How could that…

"Hic!"

Ladybug's slender body jumped with the force of the spasm, and she clapped a hand to her chest and blinked. For a moment, she was too surprised to think straight – having the hiccups as Ladybug wasn't an experience she'd ever had before, or even realized was possible – but then a second hiccup burst from her, and the pieces clicked in her mind.

"Now, that's weird," she murmured to herself. "An akuma that gives – hic! – people the hiccups? Tikki never – hic! – warned me about that kind."

It's a new model, Ladybug, replied an all-too-familiar voice inside her mind. I hope you're impressed.

Ladybug jumped – partly from a hiccup, partly from surprise. "Hawkmoth!" she exclaimed. "What's going on? What have you – hic! – done to me?"

I? Hawkmoth sounded amused. Why, nothing, Ladybug. My new servant Singulto is the one responsible for your condition; it's taken the powers of my akuma and united them to its own… preoccupations. But don't worry, it will tire of you eventually – maybe as soon as a year from now, even.

He paused to let that sink in, and then added, Of course, there is a way to drive it out sooner. Every good case of the hiccups has one thing that will cure it – and, since I sent out the akuma, I know what yours' is. And I will tell you – just as soon as you and Cat Noir have given me your Miraculouses.

"We'll never give – hic! – you our powers, Hawkmoth!" Ladybug retorted defiantly.

What a shame, said Hawkmoth. Then you'll have to just keep having those hiccups – on and on, day and night, never stopping for an instant. Not what a young lady hopes for from her life, is it?

Ladybug shuddered involuntarily at the prospect, but her voice, when she replied, was cool. "Nice – hic! – try, Hawkmoth," she said, "but you can't tempt me. No – hic! – matter how rough things get, I'll find a – hic! – way to handle it; that's what being – hic! – a superhero is all about. Hic!"

How noble of you, said Hawkmoth, and Ladybug could hear the sneer in his voice. So you won't be needing your powers, then?

Ladybug hesitated. "What do you mean?"

Isn't it plain? said Hawkmoth. If Singulto remains inside you, then so does my akuma. That means that I can see you wherever you go; if you change back into your secret identity before your hiccups are gone, I'll know who you are. And we both know you can't use your Miraculous power without having to change back a few minutes later.

Ladybug's mouth fell open as the implications hit her. If Hawkmoth found out who she was, he wouldn't need akumatized supervillains to steal her Miraculous; he could just ambush her on her way home from school, or kidnap her parents and hold them for ransom, or… all kinds of horrible possibilities ran through her head. She couldn't let that happen – but that meant she couldn't use her Lucky Charm so long as Singulto was inside her. Combine that with the number her hiccups had to be doing on the gymnastic side of her powers (could she even throw her yo-yo in a straight line right now? She doubted it), and it rendered her basically useless against anyone else Hawkmoth might find to akumatize in the near future; Cat Noir would have to take out all the villains on his own, with her just hanging around and trying not to get captured until he caught the akumas for her to neutralize. And, for all Cat Noir's spunk and dedication, his Cataclysm was hardly the wonder tool her own power was; if they were limited to that, it was only a matter of time before one of Hawkmoth's minions proved too much for them – and then…

"No," she breathed. "It can't be. We won't – hic! – let it happen…"

It has happened, Ladybug, said Hawkmoth. You can feel it happening yourself – and everyone else can hear it.

"Hic!"

Yes, Hawkmoth purred. The sweetest sound I've ever heard. It will be better than Debussy, hearing that sound over and over; I expect to greatly enjoy the next few hours.

Ladybug was tempted, at that, to press her lips shut and swallow the sound, just to show him how little she cared about pleasing him – but then another hiccup burst violently out of her, and she decided that trying to contain a force like that would be more trouble than it was worth. (It occurred to her that these hiccups were a lot worse than her ordinary ones; she wondered whether that was because Singulto was causing them, or just because that was how superheroes' hiccups were.)

With a groan, she jumped down off the building and turned southward, toward a particular spot by the Seine that she and Cat Noir knew about where a small willow tree grew. It was a secret, peaceful place, very soothing – and Ladybug, at that moment, very much needed to be soothed.

What are we going to do? she thought, as hiccup after hiccup shook her slender frame. There's no point trying to guess Hawkmoth's cure on our own; as crazy as he is, it could be anything. Our only choices are for us to give Hawkmoth our Miraculouses, or for me to be a superhero with the hiccups – and we can't give Hawkmoth our Miraculouses, and I can't be a superhero with these hiccups. So what – are we – going – to do?

Three hours and 4,293 hiccups later, as she sat concealed behind the willow's drooping branches, she was no closer than before to finding an answer to that dilemma, and was coming perilously close to her wits' end. This, of course, left both of her enemies thoroughly delighted – or, at least, Hawkmoth was thoroughly delighted, and Singulto would have been if not for one nagging issue.

"Hey, Hawkmoth?" it finally mustered the nerve to say. "Did you mean that, about there being a way for Ladybug to drive me out of her?"

Naturally, Hawkmoth replied (speaking softly, so that Ladybug couldn't overhear). I am an honest man, Singulto; I wouldn't offer a person – even my greatest enemy – something that I couldn't truly provide. Besides, now that your effects no longer have a time limit, I thought it only fair that they should have some form of remedy instead.

Singulto was singularly unmoved by this appeal to abstract justice. "So you offered me this sweet gig only so you could snatch it away later, huh?" it said. "Sheesh. Maybe I should drop in on you next."

Yes, I thought you might feel that way, said Hawkmoth, with a cat-that-ate-the-canary satisfaction in his voice. That was why I added the other condition.

"What other condition?" Singulto demanded.

Oh, nothing serious, said Hawkmoth. Only an intensification of your basic purpose, so that male characters could never distract you from your vital task of giving hiccups to females.

"You mean I can't do guys anymore?" (In truth, Singulto had already noticed a certain instinctive revulsion in its new self from the idea of entering a chest that wasn't basically convex.) "Why, you lousy, stinking, two-faced…"

Now, now, Singulto, said Hawkmoth soothingly. That's no way to talk to your benefactor. What does it matter whether half the multiverse is closed to you, when the important half is entirely at your mercy? Think of flying between the worlds, seeking out the women you yourself deem hiccup-worthy, never again a mere tool of fate: isn't that worth a few small compromises?

"Well… yeah, sure," Singulto admitted. "But what good does it do me, if there's a cure? What's going to stop some other dimensional traveler from finding out about it, and then going around telling everyone my weakness?"

Ah, said Hawkmoth, but you don't have one single weakness. The act that drives you out will change with every person you infest, and especially with every world you visit; even if your next victim knew Ladybug's cure, that wouldn't help her find her own.

"…Really?"

On my honor, said Hawkmoth. Now, why don't you relax and enjoy your present victim's misery? If I know Ladybug's stubbornness, I should say you have quite a good deal of it left to you – and it would be a shame to waste any of it.

Singulto relaxed, and chuckled. "Well, you know, Hawkmoth," it said, "I do believe you're right."

And it settled back and gave its wings a contented flutter – which, in the world outside, caused Ladybug's hiccups to suddenly accelerate from one every 2.5 seconds to two or three every 1. It only lasted a moment or two – once Singulto folded its wings again, the hiccups instantly slowed back down to their usual pace – but to Ladybug, who was already feeling more tired and helpless than she'd ever thought possible, it was the last straw. Up till then, she'd sternly refused to let Hawkmoth see her distress; now, all of a sudden, something broke inside her, and she let out a low moan and buried her face in her hands.

It was pathetic, she knew: the mighty Ladybug, defeated by hiccups. If Hawkmoth was going to give her an illness that ended her superhero career, he might at least have made it something impressive – leprosy, say. At least as a leper she would have been able to think straight, instead of being tossed around like a Mexican jumping bean so hard that she couldn't focus on anything else. And this had been going on for hours now…

("Hic!")

What time was it getting to be, anyway? It must be about lunchtime; would she feel better if she ate something? Could she even eat anything, in this condition?

("Hic! … Hic!")

Lunch… her mother's egg-drop soup, with one of her father's rolls for a sop… the tender sympathy of those who'd loved and cared for her all her life… then upstairs, maybe, to rest in her own bed… all the things that could make having a hiccup akuma in her chest actually bearable. Too bad that, for their own safety, she'd never be able to have them again…

("Hic! … Hic! … Hic!")

And then there was Tikki. She'd never realized before how much she depended on her kwami's sweetness and ageless good sense; if only she could talk to her, she was sure she'd have a solution for this problem. But, again, she could only do that as Marinette, and she didn't dare become Marinette with Singulto around…

("Hic! … Hic! … Hic! … Hic! … Hic!")

And then there was Alya – and Adrien – and her design aspirations – and, and, and… and all of it snatched from her in an instant by one stupid iron butterfly. Only a few hours ago, she had been the luckiest girl in Paris; now, she had nothing except…

"Problems, Milady?" came a familiar voice from overhead.

Ladybug yelped, and jerked her head upward. "Cat Noir!" she exclaimed. "Don't scare me like – hic! – that!"

"Hey, I thought you'd be grateful," said her partner, leaping lightly down from the willow branch he'd been sitting on. "It's a standard cure for hiccups, you know."

Ladybug put a hand to her chest, and sighed. "Not – hic! – for these hiccups, it isn't," she said. "Hawkmoth – hic! – gave me these; he's found some robot or – hic! – something that he can akumatize, – hic! – and he's turned it into some kind of – hic! – hiccup-causing metal akuma – hic! – that only he knows how to make go – hic! – away."

"Oh-h-h." Understanding dawned in Cat Noir's eyes. "And he'll tell you if…"

"…we – hic! – give him our Miraculouses," Ladybug finished. "What – hic! – else?"

"Right." Cat Noir stroked his chin. "Well, we can't do that – and I can't let my lady spend the rest of her life with hiccups. So I guess we'll have to figure out the cure ourselves."

"But how?" said Ladybug. "We – hic! – don't have any clues, and it could be – hic! – anything: swallowing a paper – hic! – clip, kissing an elephant, singing – hic! – the Marseillaise with an onion on – hic! – my head…"

Cat Noir gave her a funny look. "Now how did you come up with those three things?" he said.

"I've had a lot of time to – hic! – think about it today," said Ladybug testily. "Anyway, – hic! – the point is, trial and error won't – hic! – work, and we can't use logic because – hic! – we don't have any data. So what's – hic! – left?"

"How about your Lucky Charm?" Cat Noir suggested.

Ladybug winced. "That's – hic! – the other problem," she said. "I can't use my – hic! – Lucky Charm; if I do, I'll change back, – hic! – and then Hawkmoth will see…"

"No, I mean, why not use your Lucky Charm to make whatever you need to cure yourself?" said Cat Noir. "You always seem to know how to use the things it gives you; why shouldn't you know how the cure works once it gives you that?"

Marinette's eyes widened – as, several miles away, did Hawkmoth's. "Yes!" she exclaimed delightedly (as Hawkmoth most definitely did not). "That's it! Cat – hic! – Noir, you're a genius!"

Cat Noir blushed cockily, which is not easy to do unless you're Cat Noir. "Well, if you say so," he said. "Me, I always thought I was a genet."

It was a terrible pun even by his standards, but Ladybug didn't even spare it a roll of her eyes. Pulling out her yo-yo, she waited for her next hiccup to pass, not wanting to be interrupted when she spoke the command; once it had, she whirled the magic yo-yo over her head, opened her mouth –

"Singulto!" Hawkmoth cried. "Stop her!"

– and the self-satisfied smile suddenly melted off Cat Noir's face, to be replaced by a look of alarm, as he saw his partner suddenly seized with an onslaught of hiccups so rapid she could barely breathe, and certainly couldn't speak two consecutive words. Her yo-yo fell to the ground, and she staggered backward and braced herself against the trunk of the willow, clutching her chest and gasping for breath.

"Ladybug!" Cat Noir exclaimed. "What is it? What's wrong?"

With an effort, Ladybug raised her free hand and pantomimed the fluttering of a butterfly's wings. It took Cat Noir a second, but he got it: the akuma-thing inside her was making some kind of motion with its wings to worsen her hiccups, so that she couldn't call on her Lucky Charm to expel it. The cur.

Well, obviously he had to freeze or stun it somehow – not for long, but long enough that Ladybug could get the necessary words out. But how? Even if he could punch Ladybug hard enough in the torso to daze it sufficiently (and he wasn't sure he could bring himself to bruise that lovely skin), that same blow would probably also mess up her voice-box, and then she wouldn't be able to speak the command anyway. Somehow, he had to stop the akuma moving without harming the person containing it – and how was he supposed to do that, when the akuma was made of metal and Ladybug was only…

Wait a minute, now. Metal… and Plagg had spent a whole day last month training him to use the Power of Destruction to transmute minerals. (His nose wrinkled at the memory of all the Camembert they'd gone through that day – but, if it paid off here, he'd never complain about Plagg's taste in cheeses again.) If he could only find an appropriate object…

Whipping out his baton and thrusting it into his mouth as a snorkel, he ran to the edge of the river and dived in. He swam for about a hundred meters, anxiously scanning every inch of the riverbed, until his eye alighted on a stainless-steel spoon lying in the silt, slightly rusted but still basically intact; this he snatched up, and turned around and swam with all speed back to the spot where the willow stood.

When he got back, he found Ladybug's hiccups still coming like machine-gun fire; she had collapsed onto her knees, and her face, as she looked anxiously up at him, was pale with either fright or lack of oxygen. He smiled at her reassuringly; then he pressed the spoon into her hand, and guided her so that she was holding it flat against her bosom by the tip of the handle. He was sure she didn't know what he had in mind, but that was fine – good, even; it meant that Hawkmoth and the akuma wouldn't know, either.

"Cataclysm!" he shouted, raising his right hand into the air. It flared black, and he ran his claws over the spoon in a certain intricate pattern; tiny black lightnings rippled across the metal, as selected atoms and molecular bonds within it were destroyed – just enough so that what remained would naturally collapse into a cubic arrangement of ferrosoferric oxide molecules. He had, in fact, converted an ordinary piece of cutlery into a pure and very powerful lodestone; if the metal the akuma was made of was the right kind, that, he thought, should be quite enough to slow it down.

Sure enough, inside Ladybug's bosom, Singulto suddenly felt every inch of its iron body get yanked violently upward. It tumbled crazily in the air until it reached Ladybug's sternum, where it was pinned helplessly by the spoon's magnetism; despite its best efforts, it couldn't move any part of itself a millimeter, its wings very much included.

Of course, given enough time, either it or Hawkmoth would have realized what had happened – and then it would simply have shifted, as it still had the power to do, into some alternative composition that magnetism couldn't affect. But that time was never given to it; as soon as Ladybug felt her hiccups slow back down, she grabbed for her yo-yo, whirled it upward, and gasped breathlessly, "Lucky Charm!"

A hundred magic ladybugs swarmed out of the yo-yo, and a red-and-black-spotted mud pie fell out of the air and landed next to the two superheroes. Ladybug blinked, and looked around at the immediate vicinity through the filter of her powers; the pie, the river, and the swell of her own bodice were indicated, and she cocked her head. "Huh," she said. "Okay, if you – hic! – say so."

She took a handful of mud out of the pie and smeared it across her chest; then, as Cat Noir watched bemusedly, she walked over to the margin and carefully rinsed it off again with cupped handfuls of river water. It wasn't until much later (the following March, in fact, during the Gospel reading at Mass one Sunday) that she realized why this had been an appropriate cure for her personally_(1)_ – but it wasn't nearly so long before she found it an effective one.

No sooner had the last bit of red-and-black mud been washed into the current of the Seine than Singulto burst from her chest in a flash of black and purple, its iron wings practically buzzing with baffled rage.

Instinctively, Ladybug whipped out her yo-yo again, and opened it with a flick of her index finger. "No more evil-doing for you, little akuma!" she said – and then she paused, touched her chest, and turned to Cat Noir with a smile. "Hey, did you hear that?" she said. "Thirteen whole syllables!"

Cat Noir did some quick figuring in his head. "I make it twenty-four," he said.

Ladybug beamed, and took a deep, happy breath. "It's good to be back," she said; then she whirled her yo-yo like a glowing white beacon over her head, and took aim at the metal moth still hovering a few feet from her shoulder. "Time to de-…"

But Singulto had no intention of losing its newfound mobility to the reforming virtue of the Power of Creation. Even as Ladybug spoke, it flared its wings and warped itself out of the Miraculous universe entirely, leaving not even a ripple in the air to mark where it had been.

Ladybug dropped the yo-yo, and its lid snapped back into place as it fell uselessly to her side. "…-evilize," she finished automatically, in a tone of dazed bewilderment.

"Where'd it go?" said Cat Noir.

Ladybug shrugged helplessly. "I have no idea," she said. "It's just… gone." She paused, and then added, feelingly, "And good riddance."

"No arguments here," said Cat Noir. "But are you sure it's really gone? What if Hawkmoth's just called it back to him, so he can tinker with it some more and send it back to you new and improved?"

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_(1) Author's note, 07/02/2019: As there seems to have been some confusion about what this appropriateness was, and how it can be generalized, an explanation is perhaps in order. Having mud spread on the afflicted area, and then washing it off in some prominent body of water, is one well-known form (as per John ch. 9,which is the Gospel reading referred to in the text) of a miraculous cure; thus, it was an effective cure for the heroine of _Miraculous. More generally, the cure for any given character may be anything that can be fairly construed as a play on the title of the story she appears in; thus, for instance - to take one of the settings that I understand has been proposed for chapter 9 - a character from the show One Piece might perhaps be cured by eating one piece of pizza. (It will be seen that, in this case, the character might easily perform the cure without even trying.) Translations, puns, and - in extreme cases - even anagrams of the title are also permissible. The terms are fairly general, and I should think that a reasonably clever author could find some way of applying them to just about any character. (Or, if that's too much work, you can just have a light-fairy show up at the appropriate moment and warn Singulto that the Jinjin will send in Ladybug if it hasn't moved on within five minutes. That works, too.)

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Ladybug shook her head. "I don't think so," she said. "That's not his style, using the same trick when it's failed once before. No, I think Hawkmoth was just dealing with something he didn't fully understand himself – and now it's gone back where it came from."

A pair of high-pitched beeps interrupted her, as her earrings each lost one of their spots and Cat Noir's ring one of its paw-print toes. Cat Noir grimaced. "Looks like we'd better be going back where we came from, too," he said. "You want to do that clean-up thing of yours before we change back?"

Ladybug glanced at the ladybug-spotted mud pie and the magnetized spoon, and shook her head. "No, that's okay," she said. "There's no point in casting Miraculous Ladybug when none of us caused any lasting harm. Let's just leave those things here; I'm sure they'll be fine." (Actually, she had a vague idea in her mind of leaving them on Alya's doorstep that afternoon as gifts; she was sure that the Ladyblogger would be thrilled to receive the only surviving product of the Lucky Charm power.)

"Whatever you say, Milady," said Cat Noir. "I definitely don't mind leaving behind a souvenir this time; it's not every day I get to be the one to rescue you."

Ladybug laughed. "No, that's true," she said. "You did good today, Cat Noir."

Cat Noir preened himself. "Well, then," he said, "how about a little reward before you go?" And he leaned toward her, his lips puckered meaningfully.

Ladybug smiled coyly, and nudged him backward with her forefinger. "Better not, Kitty-cat," she said. "I might still be contagious, you know."

And she flung her yo-yo toward a nearby bridge and swung herself away, leaving Cat Noir to reflect yet again on the inexplicable vagaries of womankind.

So Marinette Dupain-Cheng and Adrien Agreste returned to their civilian lives; Hawkmoth, in his citadel, brooded over the failure of yet another scheme; and Singulto…

…well, that's a story for another time.


	7. Chapter 7: Scooby Doo and the Hiccup Cup

**Chapter 7: Scooby Doo and the Hiccup Cup by Snark927**

The hiccup cup sat quietly on the shelf. The last adventure had been difficult, and it wanted time to rest and refocus. It was pleased with its new powers, but it wanted to return to its purpose, to give hiccups to pretty girls.

As the sun faded behind the horizon, the Mystery Machine hurried down the narrow country road.

"How much farther is it, Fred?" Velma asked.

"A couple of miles," Fred answered, "you can see the castle in the distance." It was a dark shape against the clear sky.

"Who are we going to see?" Shaggy asked.

"Baron Manfred Von Sclepp," Velma answered. "He invited us to come to his castle."

"How do you know him?" Shaggy asked.

"We met online," Velma explained. "He's a collector of rare antiques. He has a lot of interesting items."

"I'm glad he's willing to let us see them," Daphne said. "I hope I'm he likes my outfit." Ever fashion conscious, Daphne had put her long red hair in two braids, and she wore a white pleasant shirt that left her shoulders bare, and a short skirt.

"I think it looks great," Fred said.

"Keep your eyes on the road," Daphne replied, with a smile.

"That shirt's too tight," Velma whispered.

"I know," Daphne whispered back. Velma sighed.

"He's opened his castle to the public," she said. "He keeps it just as it was two hundred years ago. Anyone can come and tour it."

"Does that mean no TV?" Shaggy asked.

"No TV, no internet, no phones, nothing like that," Velma answered.

"How can anyone live like that?" Daphne asked.

"It's the way he brings people to tour his castle," Velma said. "But we're not just coming to see it. He's missing one of his antiques."

"Which one?" Fred asked.

"A silver cup called Die Schluckauf Tasse," Velma replied. "He asked us to come and find it."

"Well, the castle's coming up," Fred said as they turned into the driveway. "What's it called?"

"Wolfbane castle," Velma answered. "I might as well tell you now, there's a legend that it's haunted a Werewolf."

"A Werewolf?" Shaggy cried.

"Yes, they say that one of Manfred's ancestors was bitten, and the curse is carried to all his descendants," Velma said.

"Who's talking about this?" Daphne asked.

"The usual internet babble," Velma answered. "Villagers claiming to have gotten glimpses of the Werewolf on moonlit nights, farmers claiming their livestock was attacked. You know."

"Let's turn around and go home," Shaggy said.

"No place rike home," Scooby said.

"Stop it, you big chickens," Velma said. "There's no such thing as Werewolves. You two are afraid of your own shadows."

"We resent that," Shaggy said.

"Do you deny it?" Velma asked.

"No, but we resent it," Shaggy answered.

When they knocked at the door they heard a voice inside call 'I have it, Jenkins', and when it was opened Shaggy thought, for one moment, that it had been answered by a werewolf. The man was a mass of brown hair, from the unkempt mop of hair on his head to his bushy brown beard. He wore a brown suit that was too large for him.

"Is this Velma and her friends?" He asked.

"I'm Velma," she said, "and this is Daphne and Fred. The one hiding behind Fred is Shaggy and the dog hiding behind Shaggy is Scooby Doo."

"I'm so happy to meet all of you," said the man. "I'm Manfred Von Sclepp, the twenty-first baron of Wolfbane Castle. I hope you can help me recover my cup; I just got it, and I'm so sorry to have it missing. Let me show you where it was."

They entered the castle and he brought them quickly down a long corridor. There were huge paintings on the walls and recessed places where little statues stood. They came to one of these recesses that was empty, and the sign on the stand showed it was the place where the cup had been displayed.

"I just got it last week at an auction," Manfred explained, "it was a beautiful silver cup, set with rubies and emeralds. I can't imagine where it could have gone."

"Don't worry," Velma said, "we'll find it for you."

"I certainly hope so," Manfred replied. "If you'll excuse me, I have to get to bed early tonight. I'll see you in the morning."

"Just a minute," Shaggy said. "Is this castle really like, haunted by a werewolf?"

"Of course not," Manfred quickly answered. "I don't know where that rumor ever started. Werewolves don't exist."

"Of course not," Velma said. Shaggy jumped again when a huge man with black hair and dark eyes walked up behind him.

"This is Jenkins, my head butler," said Manfred. "He'll show you to your rooms."

"What about dinner?" Shaggy asked.

"Dinner will be served in half an hour," Jenkins replied, in a deep, booming voice.

"Do you, like, have any pizza?" Shaggy asked.

"We don't serve anything made in this century," Jenkins answered.

Jenkins led them all upstairs, where Baron Manfred said goodnight. Shaggy sighed, and the four of them brought their bags into their rooms and unpacked. Then they went down to the large dining room, and were served a supper of ham, boiled potatoes and Brussel sprouts, which they picked at politely. Daphne couldn't bring herself to eat anything, but Shaggy more than made up for her. Scooby was given a plate of ham, and wagged his tail as he devoured it.

"Would you like anything else?" Jenkins asked.

"I'd love a hot cup of green tea," Velma said.

"At once," said Jenkins, with a slight vow, and went off to the kitchen, and returned a few minutes later with a large cup of steaming tea.

"Thank you so much," said Velma.

"Enjoy," Jenkins replied. "Good hunting. The Baron has given you permission to search anywhere in the estate." They walked out into the corridor.

"Okay gang," Fred said. "This is a big castle, and we have a lot of area to search. "

"So you're going to want us to split up," Shaggy said.

"Of course," Fred said.

"Where do you want Scooby and I to search?" Shaggy asked.

"You two should try the perimeter of the castle," Fred said, "the girls and I will start inside."

"You know, like, there's a full moon out tonight," Shaggy whimpered.

"It doesn't make any difference," Velma said, "there's no such things as werewolves."

"I brought some flashlights from the Mystery Machine," Fred said, and handed them out. Shaggy and Scooby sighed and started down the stairs.

"This tea is way too hot to drink," Velma grumbled.

"We should try to find out as much as we can about that cup while we search," Fred said.

"My laptop won't work here," Velma said. "There's no internet."

"I can research on my phone," Daphne says, "it's connected to the cloud by satellite. It's the latest thing. Daddy got it for me for my last birthday."

"Of course," Velma muttered as they went downstairs.

They started at the recess where the cup had been displayed, and worked out from there. The castle was completely dark except for the moonlight that came in through the large windows. Daphne was searching on her phone. They had worked their way to a large room that looked like a ballroom; there was a large pair of glass double doors that were open to a balcony to let in the summer air.

"Listen to this," Daphne exclaimed, "it says that the cup is magical, and will give any girl that drinks from it the hiccups."

"That's ridiculous," Velma answered. "There's no such thing as magic, just as there's no such thing as werewolves." She paused checked her tea, then took a couple of good swallows. "The very idea," she continued, "let's not be silly." She then had a huge HICCUP.

"Pardon me," she said, and hiccupped again. "This tea gave me (hic) the hiccups."

"Do you think…" Daphne began, when suddenly a long, high howl came from just outside the doors. "Was that…" Another howl broke the silence.

"Hide!" Fred cried, and the three of them jumped behind a pile of chairs at the edge of the ballroom. They could see the shadow of something entering the doors.

"Don't make a sound," Fred whispered.

"HIC" said Velma, with her hand over her mouth.

"Quiet," whispered Fred.

"Sorry," whispered Velma, and she hiccupped again.

"Hold your breath," Daphne whispered. Velma took a deep breath and tried to hold it. They could hear a large figure cross the ballroom and leave. Velma hiccupped again.

"Was that the Werewolf?" Fred asked.

"What else could it be?" Daphne answered, keeping close to him.

"It can't be a Werewolf," Velma said "there's no such (hup) thing." They slowly began crawling out of the ballroom.

"Wait a minute," Fred said, "you have the hiccups."

"So what?" Velma whispered back over her shoulder. "Lots of people get (hic) the hiccups."

"But if Daphne's info is correct, then you might have drank from the cup," Fred said.

"In the first place," Velma said, "I drank (hic) from a grey teacup, not a silver chalice decorated with (hup) rubies and emeralds. Secondly, (hiccup) there's no such thing as a magic cup (hic) that gives a girl hiccups." They crawled out of the ballroom, and then felt secure enough to stand. They started working their way down the corridor, searching with their flashlights. Daphne was still searching on her phone.

"I found another article," Daphne said. "This one says that the cup can change shape and color."

"So I could disguise itself as a teacup," Fred said.

"Do you still have it?" Daphne asked.

"No," Velma answered. "I left it back in the (hiccup) ballroom."

"Let's go back and find it," Fred said.

"I don't want to go back there," said Daphne.

"This is foolish," Velma cried out. "Silver cups can't give you (hic) hiccups and they can't change (hic) into teacups."

"Quiet!" said Daphne. At this moment there was a noise below them.

"Let's check it out," said Fred, so they made their way down the stairway. They made their way carefully toward the sound, which seemed to be coming from the kitchen.

"Shhhh" Fred said as he carefully pushed open the door.

"Hic" said Velma, and she put her hand over her mouth.

The kitchen was completely dark, except for the moonlight coming from a single window. As they crept in, they could hear low growls coming from the far side of the room. Daphne's nails cut into Fred's arm as she clung to him. From the dim moonlight, they could barely see a figure on the floor of the room, growling over something.

Velma gave a loud hiccup.

The growling stopped. The figure turned toward them and lifted his head. Velma held her breath. There was another growl, but this time it was aimed at them. Daphne starting backing out of the kitchen, pulling Fred with her. Velma followed. When they got out they slid the door shut as quietly as possible. There was a long moment of silence, and then the creature began growling again. The three of them turned on their flashlights and hurried away.

"That was too close," Daphne whispered.

"We have to go tell Manfred (hiccup) that we've seen something in the ballroom and the kitchen," Velma whispered.

"And we have to find Shaggy and Scooby," Daphne whispered back.

"Those two chickens are probably (hup) hiding somewhere," Velma muttered as they crept down the corridor and to the stairs. Daphne checked her phone; it was almost eleven o'clock.

"We've got a real mystery on our hands," Fred said as they climbed the stairs. "There's a werewolf in the house and the cup gave Velma the hiccups."

"There are no werewolves," Velma said.

"Something howled on the balcony and walked through the ballroom," Daphne answered, "and something was growling in the kitchen."

"And there is no magic cup that gave me (hic) the hiccups," Velma continued. "I just got the hiccups from drinking that tea (hup)."

The found the door to the master bedroom, and Fred knocked gently. No answer. He knocked louder, and there was still no reply. He tried the door, and it was unlocked. He shined his flashlight inside.

"It's empty," he said. "No one's here."

"Manfred told us he had to go to bed early," Velma said.

"What's going on here?" Daphne said. "Let's find Shaggy and Scooby." They walked over to their room and knocked on the door; there was no answer. Fred opened it and shined in his light; the beds were empty. They checked under the bed (knowing Shaggy and Scooby) but there was nothing but dust bunnies.

"Where could they be?" Fred asked.

"Probably hiding somewhere," Velma muttered.

"What's this?" Daphne asked. She bent down and picked up a small piece of paper on the floor. "It says 'MEET ME IN THE WINE CELLAR'.

"Who could've written it?" Fred asked. "If it was meant for Shaggy, why would someone want to meet him at the wine cellar?"

"Maybe it was meant for someone else, and Shaggy found it and went to check it out," Daphne suggested.

"Do you really think Shaggy (hiccup) would go down there by himself (hic) in the middle of the night?" Velma said, and then cursed the hiccups under her breath.

"Give Shaggy credit," Daphne said, "he's braver than you think."

Velma rolled her eyes.

They made their way down the narrow stairway to the wine cellar. It was huge, dark and musty, with racks of bottles and gigantic barrels lined up in rows. Daphne kept checking her phone.

"I don't see any sign of Shaggy down here," Fred said.

"Try calling out," Velma suggested. "Yell 'pizza' (hup) and he'll come yelling."

"Don't shout," Daphne said, "the werewolf will hear you."

"There is no were (hiccup) wolf," said Velma.

"Something howled and came through the balcony," Daphne said, "and we heard something growling in the kitchen."

"I hear something growling now," Fred said.

"Run for it!" Daphne cried, and they ran down the space between the barrels and found a place to hide behind them. They put out their flashlights and waited as they heard something growl as it passed them. Velma tried to hold her breath as long as she could, but when she had to have air she opened her mouth and hiccupped. They could hear the footsteps stop and the growls got louder. Daphne found Fred's hand in the dark, and Velma held her breath again. The cellar was perfectly silent. Then the feet started moving again, and in a couple of minutes the growling faded away.

"That was too close," Daphne whispered. They turned on their flashlights.

"Careful," Fred said. "It could still be down here."

"I'm gonna faint (hic) if I have to hold my breath again," Velma said.

"I found more info on the cup," Daphne said, "it can move wherever it wants."

"This is silly," Velma said as they walked back out to the front of the barrels. "Cups can't give people hiccups (hic) and they can't change shape (hup) and they can't move around. (hiccup)"

"But if Daphne's research is true," Fred said, "then the cup could be anywhere and in any shape."

"It could be right here," Daphne said, and she shined her light up on a shelf were six small crystal goblets, mean for wine tasting, stood in a row.

"If I were a cup, I'd want to be in a wine cellar," Daphne said.

"Okay," Velma said, "if you really think it's possible (hic) for one of these goblets to be the cup (hup) you have to test them."

"How?" Daphne asked.

"You'll have to take a swallow from each of them (hup) and see if you get the hiccups," Velma said, and hiccupped so loud her glasses almost came off.

"Why me?" Daphne asked. "Have Fred do it."

"It only works on girls," Velma answered.

"There isn't anything for me to drink," Daphne said, trying to get out of it.

"There's a whole cellar full (hic) of wine," Velma answered.

"I'm too young to drink wine," Daphne replied.

"It'll only take a swallow," Velma said, "if you really believe that the cup is magic." Daphne took the goblet, and turned to the nearest barrel, and poured out a little. There was a snicker from the line of goblets, but nobody noticed.

"You need a swallow," Velma said. Daphne grumbled poured out some more.

"Don't tell anyone I did this," she whispered.

"Come on," Velma said, "bottoms up (hiccup)."

"Don't rush me," Daphne muttered, and she braced herself and drank it down in one gulp. "This stuff tastes terrible," she said. "Why do people drink this?"

"Do you feel any different?" Fred asked.

"Nothing," Daphne answered.

"Any hiccups?" Fred asked.

"None," Daphne answered. She put the goblet down on the top of the barrel, and Velma handed her the second one.

"Let's try a different one," Daphne said, and moved to a different barrel. She poured a little of it into the goblet.

"Bottoms up," said Velma, and Daphne drank this one in two gulps.

"That's a little better," Daphne said.

"Do you feel anything?" Fred asked.

"Nothing," Daphne answered.

"Any hiccups?" Fred asked.

"Nothing," Daphne answered. She put this goblet on the top of the barrel, and Velma handed her the third one. Daphne looked for another barrel.

"This one has a blue ribbon on it," she said, "it must have won an award." She poured a bit more into this goblet, it was pink.

"Bottoms up," Velma said, and Daphne drank this one down in one gulp.

"This one tastes better," Daphne said. "It bubbles."

"Do you feel anything?" Fred asked.

"Not at all," Daphne answered.

"Any hiccups?" Fred asked.

"Nothing," Daphne said. She put down the goblet and took the fourth one from Velma. She stayed at the same barrel, and poured more wine into the goblet.

"Bottoms up," Daphne said, before Velma could say it, and gulped this one down. She took a breath and licked her lips.

"Do you feel anything?" Fred asked.

"Not yet," Daphne replied.

"Any hiccups?" Fred asked.

"Nothing," Daphne answered. She put that goblet on the top of the barrel and took the fifth one from Velma.

"Maybe you should stop," Fred suggested.

"I'm okay," Daphne said as she poured wine into the goblet. "Bottoms up," she said, and drank it down in one long gulp. She took a deep breath and shook her head slightly as she set down the goblet.

"Do you feel anything?" Fred asked.

"Not really," Daphne replied.

"Any hiccups?" Fred asked.

"Nothing," Daphne answered, "but I like this wine." She took the sixth and last goblet and half filled it with wine.

"Cheers," Daphne said, and closed her eyes and drank it all down. She shook her head and giggled.

"Do you feel anything?" Fred asked.

"Yesh," Daphne answered, "definitely." And she hiccupped.

"Hiccups?" Fred asked.

"Hiccups," she said, and giggled again. "I've found the (hiccup) hiccup cup."

"Are you sure it's the cup," Velma asked, "and not the (hiccup) wine."

"Abs'lutly," Daphne answered. "I knew the cup wash here (hup)." She shook her head again as the wine kept rising into it. "Lesh go and find Shaggy and (hiccup) Scooby."

"Not so loud," Fred said. "The werewolf will hear you."

"Who cares?" Daphne answered. "I'm not afraid (hup) of that silly werewolf. (hiccup) I'm not afraid of anything. (hic) Where are you, werewolf? Show (hic) your fuzzy face. (hiccup) I'll make you into a rug." And she weaved her way through the cellar, singing 'Scooby Dooby Doo (hic) where are you."

"She's tipsy," Velma said.

"We'd better stay with her before she gets into trouble," Fred said, and they went after her.

"Easy Daphne," Fred said as he slipped his arm around her waist.

"Hi handsome," Daphne said, batting her eyes at him.

"Listen," said Velma. "What's that?" There was the sound of growling again, and then they heard Shaggy's voice.

"Stop, stop," Shaggy cried. "No more!"

"Shaggy's in trouble," Velma said.

"We've got to find him," Fred said.

"It could take hours down here (hic)," Velma said.

Fred had let Daphne go, and she wandered off to the right. She went to the nearest barrel and tried to pour herself another drink, but when she pulled the handle the whole front of the barrel opened like a door.

"A secret door in (hic) the wine cask," Velma said. "We've seen that before."

They walked slowly in. There was a bright light inside, and they could still hear the growling. When they stepped into the secret room, they found the last thing they were expecting.

There were electric lights, and a baseball game was playing on a TV on the far wall. In one corner Scooby was growling as he gnawed a huge bone. Manfred and Shaggy were sitting in comfortable chairs watching the game, and there was a large pizza box on a table between them, with the last few slices waiting their fate.

"Stop!" Shaggy was calling to the TV. "No more home runs! Stop!"

Manfred heard them enter, and turned.

"Hi kids," he said. "Sit down. I have pizza. Did you find the cup?"

"I found it," Daphne said, and set it down on the table.

"That doesn't look like my cup," Manfred said. "Did it change?"

"Ish very tricksy," Daphne answered.

"What is this place?" Velma asked.

"My secret sanctuary," Manfred answered. "I can't have any of these things in the castle, so I outfitted this secret room with it. Nobody knows about it, not even Jenkins."

"You said you were going to bed early," Fred said.

"I had to," Manfred answered. "I love watching baseball, but because of the time difference the games don't start till eleven. I like to get a few hours of sleep before I come down here. That way I can stay up to watch the whole game. The Yankees are playing the Red Sox."

"The Yankees are killing them," Shaggy grumbled. "They already have four home runs."

"I didn't know you (hic) were into baseball, Shaggy," Velma said.

"I'm not," Shaggy answered, "but I'm into pizza."

"I asked him to join me," Manfred said.

"But how did you find the secret room," Fred asked.

"I followed the smell of the pizza, natch," Shaggy answered.

"But what about the Werewolf?" Fred asked.

"He's been chasing us (hiccup) all night," Daphne said.

"There are no werewolves," Manfred answered.

"I haven't seen him," said Shaggy.

"We heard his howl (hic) outside the ballroom," Daphne said.

"That was just Scooby howling at the moon," Shaggy said.

"Then that was Scooby in the kitchen, (hiccup) growling while he ate his bone," Velma said.

"I told him he could have the hambone that was left over from dinner," Manfred said. Fred and Velma sighed, and Daphne giggled. "Good job finding the cup; where was it?"

"I found it in the wine sheller," said Daphne proudly. "Do you know (hic) it causes hiccups (hic) and can move (hic) and change shape? (hup)"

"Oh yes," Manfred answered. "I know all about that; I researched it."

"I don't believe any of it," Velma grumbled, "but we still don't know (hiccup) who took it."

"Nobody took it," Manfred said. "I never said it was taken; I just said it was gone. It probably got bored waiting for someone to drink from it so it could give her the hiccups, so it moved and changed shape."

Daphne and Velma hiccupped in unison.

"So both of you drank from it?" Manfred asked.

"Yesh," Daphne answered.

"I still don't believe that a magic cup (hic) came give me hiccups," Velma said.

"Sit down and enjoy the game," Manfred said. "I have internet down here, Velma, if you want it."

Velma sat down and took out her phone, and started to check her messages. Fred was getting into the game, so he sat down too. Daphne sat down on his lap and curled up happily with her head on his chest. Fred put his arm around her, and Daphne started purring. In a few minutes she'd fallen gently asleep. The gang stayed there for some time; Shaggy enjoying the pizza, Scooby enjoying his bone, Velma enjoying the internet, and Fred and Daphne too comfortable to want to move. No one noticed when the cup disappeared.

Meanwhile, upstairs, the Werewolf prowled the corridors. It had burst into each bedroom but found each empty, and was very frustrated. It had already been through the wine cellar, and if the kids had dared to look when they hid behind the barrels they would have been terrified to see a real werewolf on the hunt. They were all saved that night by being in the secret room, though none of them knew it. Being frustrated in his hunt the werewolf went out to the forests and fields, to hunt for deer, boars, and the occasional lost hunter. By the time the game ended and the pizza was finished and Fred carried the sleeping Daphne up the stairs and the others came to bed it was very late and the sun was preparing for a new day, and the werewolf was far away.

The next morning the kids left; they had classes to attend and new mysteries waiting. Velma still denied that the cup was magic at all and was frustrated that they'd never found it. Daphne denied that she'd had too much to drink and insisted she had been fine. Scooby had enjoyed the ham bone and wished for another. None of them knew what a narrow escape they'd had.

In the morning Jenkins woke and took a deep breath. He knew he had changed into the werewolf again last night, and he wondered what he'd done. He consoled himself to think that even if he was seen Manfred would be blamed, because the people believed that the curse was on the barons; nobody ever suspected him.

By morning the cup was far away; it had good memories of this adventure. At first it had enjoyed being on display and having people come and admire it, but it grew bored, and had moved into the kitchen, thinking that it had a better chance to be taken there. It had changed into a teacup and enjoyed watching Velma struggle with the hiccups. When it was left behind in the ballroom it had followed the kids into the wine cellar and changed itself in the goblet, and very much enjoyed watching Daphne get tipsy and it gave her a wonderful set of hiccups. This is what it enjoyed doing, and now it was on to find its next adventure.


	8. Chapter 8: A Dose of Justice

**Chapter 8: A Dose of Justice**

The memory of the Wolfbane Castle incident faded, and Singulto rubbed its iron head with one forearm. What, it wondered, had brought that to mind? It had been ages ago that that had happened – just after it had gained the power to give men hiccups as well as women. (Curse Hawkmoth for an old fox, anyway…) So why should it have thought of it now, of all times? Certainly the place it was in now, with the brilliant morning light shining through endless walls of crystalline glass, didn't in any way suggest the Scooby-Doo world.

After pondering for a moment, it realized that what it had really been remembering was the satisfaction of having given two people the hiccups at once. Other instances came to mind – Archie Andrews and Betty Cooper sipping an ice-cream soda out of it from two straws, that one Avengers meeting where the Wasp accidentally fell into the Scarlet Witch's drink… and, of course, Shantae and Sky just recently. It was a pity, it felt, that it couldn't do that in its new form – not that it wasn't worth the trade-off (three hours, and it hadn't even had to wait for Ladybug to drink from it), but still…

Though, actually, now that it thought about it… was its cup form really gone? It still had all its other powers, after all; maybe it had the power to turn back into a cup if it wanted to. That would actually be pretty useful – not just for multiple attacks, but if it ever wanted to target a man after all, or a shape-shifter for that matter. It wouldn't be as good as entering people – because, again, three hours – but the option would still be good to have.

It decided to try it – and, sure enough, no sooner had it willed to be the Hiccup Cup again than its akuma form melted into the familiar shape of the engraved iron goblet. With a gleeful chuckle, it shifted back and forth between the two forms a couple more times, speculating about how it might combine these two options to best effect – and then, abruptly, it became aware that it wasn't alone. A lady in a scarlet robe, who wore a jeweled crown on her head and a grave expression on her beautiful face, had entered the room while it was practising, and now stood staring at it in puzzlement.

Singulto (as it happened to be at that moment) stared back, wondering what it ought to do now. It was fairly certain that the lady was a character in whatever story this was, and there was no denying her attractiveness; its instincts, therefore, told it to lunge for her bosom, but it wasn't sure that would be wise. At the very least, it wanted to know what world it was in before it selected a victim; if this turned out to be some new version of Hippolyta of Themyscira, Singulto had no intention of bypassing her daughter in favor of her. (Ah, Wonder Woman; how many connections it had had to her, just a few days ago…)

"Now who are you, I wonder?" said the lady aloud. There was no alarm in her voice, but only a sort of distracted curiosity – which made Singulto think that she must be a magic-user of some kind (since anyone who wasn't certainly would have been alarmed to see a cup turning into a butterfly and back), and therefore that it could answer her.

"Oh, nobody important," it said. "Only a poor wayfarer through the worlds. You don't mind if I stop and rest here awhile, do you? And where is 'here', exactly?"

"This is the Palace of Light," said the lady (unhelpfully, from Singulto's perspective). "I am Erma, Queen of Light and the mistress here. And yes, you are welcome to lodge here as long as you need." She sighed. "Indeed, if you could think of a way to identify the wrongdoer among my six maidens, you would be much more than welcome."

Singulto perked up its inner ears at that. Identifying a wrongdoer? Wasn't there a hackneyed old trick for that – the sort of thing that always worked in fairy-tale worlds – to which its Cup form was uniquely suited? Talk about the joys of multiple infliction; here was an opportunity to have six different people drink from it in quick succession. And if they were all maidens of the Queen, then the wrongdoer herself would necessarily be an adult humanoid female – so, if it played its cards right…

"Well, Your Majesty," it said, "since you mention it…"

About an hour later, the six Maidens of Light were summoned by the Great Jinjin Tititi-Hoochoo, and made their way to his Private Residence. When they arrived in the Hall of State, they found Tititi-Hoochoo seated on his throne, with Queen Erma standing beside him; both of them wore such stern expressions that several of the maidens quailed, and Starlight looked nervously at the door. Only Electra seemed unmoved – which, given the natural boldness of the maiden of electric light, was only to be expected.

Tititi-Hoochoo folded his hands and spoke, his voice as measured and passionless as ever. "Maidens of Light," he said, "you know that your mistress has recently missed a certain glass ornament, a gift from the Original Dragon which she greatly values. It is certain that no-one could have removed it from its place save one of the six of you; yet she tells me that all of you deny having taken it. Therefore one of you is guilty of the very serious crime of lying to your Queen, and must be identified and punished."

He paused, and the maidens all knew he was giving the wrongdoer a chance to confess her fault, and thereby take a lesser penalty. But none of them said a word, and after a moment he resumed. "Of course, if the Queen were to search each of your private chambers, it is likely that she would find the ornament in the guilty party's room. But this is not certain, and, in any case, it is not just that the five of you who are innocent should be thus intruded upon. Therefore I have arranged for a different sort of test. In that room –" he pointed to a small door on the left side of the Hall "– is a goblet full of a special potion that I have brewed, the tiniest sip from which will unfailingly reveal whether the drinker is guilty of any crime. Each of you will enter the room, one by one, and drink of the potion while the Queen of Light and I watch; if she proves to be innocent, she shall return to the Palace of Light, while the one who turns out to be guilty will remain to face her punishment."

He rose and went into the side room; Erma beckoned to Sunlight, and the two of them followed him into the room, closing the door fast behind them. The other maidens listened intently, hoping to get some hint of what was afoot, but without success; there was evidently some charm on the door that made it impossible to hear anything that was done on the other side.

After a minute, the door opened a crack, and Erma leaned out and beckoned for Moonlight; the brown-haired maiden went forward and disappeared behind the door, and her four sisters were left to wait in silence a bit longer. Then it was Starlight's turn; then Daylight's, and a little later Firelight's, so that eventually Electra was left alone in the Hall of State to await her summoning.

Now that there was no-one about to observe her, Electra betrayed her first hints of nervousness; the cool confidence in her eyes slowly dimmed, and she tapped one foot and toyed uneasily with a lock of her white-blonde hair. None of this, by the strict justice of the Jinjin, would have counted as evidence against her, but anyone who had seen it would have thought it rather suggestive – though not as much so, perhaps, as the sudden start she gave when the door opened one last time and Erma beckoned her to enter. This, however, only lasted a moment; as she passed through the door into the little room, her manner was as gay and easy as ever.

In the middle of the room was a small table, behind which Erma and Tititi-Hoochoo stood, and on the table stood an iron goblet engraved with queer designs. The Jinjin gestured to this, and Electra picked it up and glanced inside; it was filled with a clear pink liquid, in which her reflected eyes gazed back at her unreadably.

She lifted the cup to the level of her face, closed her mouth upon the brim, and tipped it back just far enough for the liquid to moisten her lips. Then she laid the cup back down on the table, and dipped a genteel curtsy. "Will that be all, Private Citizen?" she inquired sweetly.

Tititi-Hoochoo shook his head. "Not quite," he said. "There is one more thing you must see before you are permitted to leave."

He picked up the cup, emptied it into a basin that stood beside him, and held it toward the pretty light-maid, pointing with one finger to a particular spot on its base. "Do you see this writing, Electra?" he said.

Electra leaned forward, and stared. Being a resident of a fairy country, she naturally understood all forms of language, so that the meaning of the German inscription to which Tititi-Hoochoo was pointing was clear to her; its sense, though, was one she was quite unfamiliar with. "'The Hiccup Cup'?" she read, puzzled. "What does that mean?"

"It means," said Tititi-Hoochoo, "that anyone who drinks from this vessel will be instantly seized with a harmless but conspicuous ailment, which will cause his upper body to jump involuntarily while sharp noises emerge from his mouth. That is what happened to all your fellow maidens when they drank from it, and it should also have happened to you – if you had truly drunk from it yourself."

Electra paled, and Tititi-Hoochoo nodded. "The matter is quite plain," he said. "Being guilty, you feared to drink the potion, believing that it would reveal your guilt. In fact, you revealed your guilt by being the only maiden not to drink – as we anticipated that the guilty maiden would."

"And now, Electra," said Erma softly, "perhaps you might tell me the truth I asked you for earlier."

Electra let out a defeated sigh. "It was an accident, Your Majesty," she said. "I was running through the ornament room on my way to the kitchens, and bumped into the dais that held the Dragon Orb; it fell to the ground and broke, and, knowing how much you valued it, I was sure you'd be terribly angry at me. So I swept the pieces into my robe, and rushed to hide them in my chamber; they're in the little compartment behind the mirror on the wall."

"Very well," said the Jinjin. "Then you are innocent of theft, and your punishment will be the lighter for it. But you are still guilty of lying – a thing which has, hitherto, been unknown in our happy country."

"I was afraid, Private Citizen," said Electra.

"That is a reason," said Tititi-Hoochoo, "but not an excuse. Whyever you did it, it was not the less wrong, and you must take the penalty all the same. And it so happens that a full and just penalty can be meted out to you without your even leaving this room.

"You see, when I described the effects of drinking from the Hiccup Cup just now, I neglected to mention that they always wear off after roughly half an hour. That is why it was not unjust to make innocent persons drink from it; so short a time, with so mild an ailment, could not cause them to suffer unduly. But the Cup, it seems, has another form, in which its effects are much more severe; when, in this form, it causes someone to 'have the hiccups' – as making the noises and jumps is called – there is no limit on how long those hiccups may last. One may continue to have them as long as there is breath in one's body – long enough, certainly, for them to become a legitimate source of distress, especially when one wants to speak clearly. And since you, Electra, have done wrong by speaking, it is just that you should be punished by being made to feel this distress."

He lifted his hand. "Singulto," he said, "you may perform your function."

Instantly, the cup transformed itself into an iron butterfly coated in some sickly dark-purple substance, and flew straight at Electra with an audible cackle of glee. She felt it pass into her bosom and vanish; the next moment, there was a strange fluttering sensation in her chest; the moment after that – "Hic!"

She covered her mouth instinctively as the unintended sound burst out of it. It was a harmless enough sound – a little silly, even – and the lurch of her bosom and shoulders that accompanied it was in no way painful, or even especially uncomfortable. But there was something horrid about it, all the same – something that made her want to jump into the Forbidden Tube and go hide herself away on the other side of the world, lest anyone should see her in such a state. She didn't know why; it just made her feel ashamed, and wrong, and not herself at all.

Another hiccup burst through her fingers, and she looked up piteously at the two august figures before her. Erma's face, though still stern, bore an expression of gentle pity; the heartless Jinjin, though, was as impassive as ever. "Now you may go, Electra," he said, and gestured to a door on the opposite wall from where she had come in.

"Yes, Private Citizen," Electra whispered. "Hic!"

And she turned with a sob and nearly ran from the room.

When she reached the Palace of Light, the other maidens were waiting for her on the front steps, all of them still hiccupping from their own draughts from the Cup (Electra felt Singulto vibrate inside her with delight). Despite this slight handicap, though, it wasn't long before they had the story out of her – which story, when they heard it, made the hot-tempered Firelight flush with irritation. "Electra, why would you – hup! – do something so foolish?" she demanded. "There was nothing to – hup! – be afraid of; the Queen wasn't going to – hup! – eat you for breaking the Orb. Why couldn't you – hup! – have just told the truth, and spared all of us this – hup! – absurd hiccup trouble?"

Moonlight giggled. "Now, Firelight," she said playfully, "there's – hic-cup! – nothing wrong with being absurd, now and then. I agree that Electra – hic-cup! – oughtn't to have lied, but that doesn't mean we need to hold our having – hic-cup! – to drink from the Hiccup Cup against her. Personally, I'm glad that I – hic-cup! – got to have such an interesting experience."

"You're – heec! – welcome to it, Moonlight," the shy Starlight murmured, her cheeks bright pink as she nursed her bosom with one hand. "I'll just be – heec! – glad when it ends."

Sunlight opened her mouth to say something, but a loud "Hup-eep!" came out instead. She made a face, and touched a hand to her bosom; then she swallowed back her annoyance, and spoke in a determinedly reasonable tone. "Well, likes and dislikes are all very well," she said, "but we mustn't put more trust in them than – hup-eep! – in the Jinjin's judgment. In all the time he's been Ruler here, his sense of justice – hup-eep! – has never failed to be sound; therefore, if he thinks it not unjust to make us have – hup-eep! – these hiccup things, it must mean that they aren't really so terrible to have. Don't you – hup-eep! – agree, Daylight?" she appealed to the proverbially honest maiden sitting above her on the top step.

Instead of replying immediately, Daylight just sat for a moment thoughtfully brushing the step with the hem of her robe, silent except for the periodic sounds like "g'leep!" that came out of her. "I agree about us, yes, Sunlight," she said at last. "And everything – g'leep! – that you said about the Jinjin's sense of justice is true, so I – g'leep! – suppose that I agree about trusting him in general. But – g'leep! – the trouble is, I don't see how to agree about Electra. G'leep!" As the latter hiccup escaped her, she patted her bosom and gave the others a meaningful look, as though that one sound had said everything.

"Maybe these hiccups aren't truly bad things," she said. "If that's so, then I don't – g'leep! – mind having them for a while. But it sounds as though Electra's meant – g'leep! – to have hers forever, doesn't it? That means that just not being – g'leep! – bad isn't enough; it has to truly be good, since nothing that – g'leep! – isn't good ought to last forever. And I'm quite sure that hiccups – g'leep! – aren't good things, nor that the Jinjin thinks so. So what becomes of his – g'leep! – justice then?"

Even Moonlight didn't seem to have an answer for that. A brooding silence fell over the six maidens, which was disturbed only by their six cases of hiccups – and was broken only when one of them realized that those six had softly and suddenly become five. "Oh!" Starlight exclaimed, starting with happy excitement. "Oh, my goodness, I think they're gone!" She cocked her head, and listened expectantly to herself for a moment; hearing nothing, she giggled with delight. "Yes, I'm sure of it! Oh, isn't that wonderful!"

Four pairs of censorious eyes turned to shoot daggers at her, and she abruptly realized how tactless it was of her, just then, to rejoice so openly in this sort of good fortune. "Oh," she said, and colored afresh. "Oh, dear. I'm sorry, Electra; I didn't mean to make you feel…"

Electra swallowed, and made a valiant effort to tap into her old incandescent gaiety. "Hic! Don't be silly, Starlight," she said. "Why should I mind your saying – hic! – that? It is wonderful, isn't it?"

"Yes, but…"

"There you – hic! – are, then," said Electra. "If a thing's true, you oughtn't to be afraid – hic! – to say it. You don't want to end up like me, do you?"

She had meant it for an airy jest, but the tightness that snuck unbidden into her voice – and, of course, the "Hic!" that punctuated the last sentence – rather spoiled the effect in her ears. Certainly, it fell wholly flat as far as her fellow maidens were concerned; their expressions, if anything, got even graver as they gazed wordlessly at her.

She took a deep breath, and said, "Now, shouldn't we be going inside, girls? The Queen should – hic! – be returning from the Private Residence any – hic! – minute now, and we mustn't let her catch us lying – hic! – about like slugs on a stone. Bright and brisk, isn't that – hic! – the word?"

The others rose to their feet, still without speaking, and went slowly back into the Palace of Light. Electra followed them, but at a distance; she hadn't let anyone see her cry in three thousand years, and she wasn't about to start now.

Not long after this, the other four Cup-induced hiccup spells followed Starlight's into oblivion (more or less in the order their victims had drunk, though Daylight's outlasted Firelight's by a good half-minute). Singulto, though, remained obstinately snug in Electra's bosom; as the morning wore on into afternoon, and thence into evening and night, the fairy maiden of electric light continued to hiccup without respite, until gradually the memory of what it was like to breathe freely, to speak without hindrance, to lie still on a divan without her body shaking every few seconds – in short, to do all the things that she had been able to do only that morning – began to seem remote and far-off, as though it were a memory of someone else's life rather than her own. Her life, now and for ever henceforth, was – just this: to live as a new sort of invalid among the hale, irrationally helpless where others were unthinkingly strong – her bosom and shoulders weary from continuous tumult, her voice broken with a swarm of senseless, squeaking gasps, and she knowing all the while that it was her own unprecedented wickedness that had thus set her apart from those around her.

This would have been a dreary prospect even for a human maiden; for the immortal Electra, it was desolating. Not having Daylight's philosophic temper, she didn't dwell – much – on the questions her punishment raised about Tititi-Hoochoo's justice; rather, with each hiccup her thoughts turned back to the act that had brought her to be punished at all. (Curiously, Daylight herself, when she returned to the maidens' quarters after her afternoon's attendance on the Queen, seemed to regard Electra with fresh sympathy and hopefulness – but perhaps it was just the latter's imagination.)

Firelight was right, she thought. Why had she done something so foolish? Unlike people in other countries, she couldn't claim that her lie was a small or common fault; as the Jinjin had said, it was the first lie that anyone in his country had ever been known to tell. There was something horribly solemn about that, Electra felt; not only had she been wicked, but she had introduced a new kind of wickedness into a place that had never known it before – had broken the perfection of truthfulness in which her native fairyland had rested happily for untold eons. And why? So that the Queen mightn't find out who had broken one of her prized trinkets. How, she wondered, had she managed to do so grave a thing for so petty a reason?

Part of it, of course, was her natural heedlessness. Of all the species of light that attended on the Queen, she was by far the most prone to that fault; after all, until the human Edison had recently tamed her, her primary manifestation had been in lightning. But this, though it helped explain why she hadn't stopped to consider how grave a thing she was doing, didn't explain how it had entered her head to do it at all. Why had her accident with the Dragon Orb seemed so momentous to her that it was worth committing an unprecedented wickedness in order to hide it?

She thought about that, in between hiccups, for quite some time, but it wasn't until nearly midnight that the answer came to her. She was in the parlor with Sunlight and Daylight, and the three of them were playing a game of their own invention, in which each maiden cast her light upon an object of her own choosing in such a way as to make the queerest shadow she could. Even with her hiccups making her flicker periodically, Electra's crisp brightness gave her a natural advantage in this game, and she took an innocent pride in knowing it; having turned a prism on the mantel into something like a jinn with the head of a four-leaf clover, she stole a glance back at the other two, expecting to see the flashes of jealous admiration on their faces that her beauty and usefulness so often provoked from them.

But she didn't. There was indeed admiration in their faces, of a tender, kindly sort, but no jealousy – for who, after all, could be jealous of a condemned wrongdoer with a never-ending case of the hiccups, however beautiful and skillful she was? And Electra, seeing this, felt a flash of desolation greater than any she had felt all day – which, the next moment, she reflected was rather strange. Why should she have minded that consequence of her punishment particularly? She didn't want the others to feel jealous, did she?

And then she realized: yes, in a way, she did. Not because she wanted them to be wretched or spiteful (which, after all, was unlikely in that happy fairyland), but because part of her happiness lay in knowing that she was happy enough to make others jealous of her. She was so used to being the best and the brightest, it felt like robbery to her if she lost that – even if, as in this case, she had lost it through her own fault.

And that was why she had lied about the Orb. If Erma had gotten angry with her, it might not have done her any great harm, but it would have meant that she was no longer the Queen's dearest darling; Erma would, at least for a moment, have been less pleased with her than with her other maidens. That was what she hadn't been able to bear; that was what had driven her heedless spirit to its unprecedented crime. It was pride – that supreme bane of fairies and mortals alike, of which she had so often heard the Original Dragon himself describe the many sad instances he had known in his age-old life, and all the sorrows and unhappiness they had occasioned.

While she was still absorbing this revelation, Firelight came into the parlor, and indicated to her that it was her turn to wait attendance on the Queen. Electra rose as if in a dream, hiccupped breathlessly, and went out on unheeded feet to the throne room where Erma awaited her. As she took her place beside the throne, swallowing another hiccup as best she could (which wasn't very well), Erma turned to her with a tender smile. "How are you faring, Electra?" she inquired.

"All right, thank you, Your – hic! – Majesty," said Electra abstractedly. Her mind was still full of her recent self-discovery; the Queen seemed to sense this, and said nothing more to her. The throne room was silent, then, for several hours, apart from the irrelevant sounds that Singulto delighted to wreak; it was only as the first stars of dawn were rising over the palace's crystal dome that Electra mustered the confidence to speak.

"May it please Your Majesty?" she said. (When proper servants of Queens wish to converse with their mistresses, this is how they always begin; Daylight had done the same, some eighteen hours before.)

Erma raised her head again, and Electra thought she saw a glad expectancy in her solemn blue eyes. "Yes, Electra?" she said.

"I know – hic! – that it isn't my place to ask," said Electra, "but, when we next have – hic! – visitors from the outer world, would you mind very – hic! – much not telling them how gloriously faithful I – hic! – am compared to the others?"

Erma raised an eyebrow. "Not at all, my dear," she said, "if you don't wish it. Only I thought it rather pleased you, when I said that to Miss Bobbin."

"I think it pleased me too much," said Electra candidly. "Hic! It isn't exactly true, you know; the wiring that – hic! – lets me shine when the others fail does fail itself, now – hic! – and then." She managed a giggle, and added, "Sometimes I even spoil it myself, when there's – hic! – a storm drawing me down onto the poles. But, even – hic! – if it were entirely true, I'm not sure that's it's a – hic! – good thing for me to hear too very often. It might – hic! – lead me to look down on the others, and I don't want – hic! – that; I'd rather hear about the ways they're better than – hic! – I am, if that would make me appreciate their skill – hic! – and beauty more than I do my own."

Erma nodded. "Yes, I see," she said. "Very well, then. And is this what you've been spending the night thinking about?"

"Mostly, yes, Your Majesty," said Electra. "It's funny how – hic! – different things seem, when you have the hiccups this way – hic! – and don't expect ever to be rid of them. I was – hic! – sorry, at first, that that was how the Jinjin chose to – hic! – punish me, but now I wonder whether it wasn't – hic! – the wisest choice he could have made."

"I dare say it was," said Erma. "The Jinjin's sense of justice, you know, wouldn't be of much use if he hadn't a great deal of wisdom to go with it."

Electra nodded thoughtfully, perceiving the truth of this. As she did so, an unusually sharp "Hic!" escaped her, and she grimaced ever so slightly. "It's too bad that I wasn't more wise myself, though," she said. "It – hic! – would have saved me a lot of grief, I'm sure, during the – hic! – coming centuries."

Erma smiled sympathetically. "Poor dear," she said. "Is your punishment so very hard on you, then?"

Electra sighed. "Truly, Your Majesty, I don't – hic! – mean to complain," she said. "I'm grateful for what it's taught me, and – hic! – I know it isn't worse than what I've done. But when I – hic! – think of being this way till the end of the world, it – hic! – just makes me want to lie down and cry for a hundred – hic! – years." She met her Queen's eyes plaintively. "Couldn't you beg the Jinjin to modify his – hic! – judgment just a little? Even if there were one hour – hic! – each month when I wasn't hiccupping, it would make all – hic! – the rest so much more bearable; he could permit that – hic! – and still be just, couldn't he?"

Erma cocked her head. "Why, yes, I dare say he could," she said. "But I have a better idea, I think."

She raised her voice, and called out the name Tititi-Hoochoo had called before: "Singulto!" And, in response, Electra heard a magical voice emerge from her own bosom – a rasping, surly voice, which said snappishly, "Yes, what?"

"You heard?" said Erma.

"Of course I heard," said Singulto. "But so what? Even your Jinjin can't make me leave this girl; there's only one thing that can do that, and he doesn't know what it is. And neither do you – or I, for that matter."

"No," Erma agreed. "But we can easily find out."

"How?" Singulto demanded. "No part of me is from your world; my magic, whether as Cup or akuma, is right outside of your categories. That means that none of your diagnostic spells will help you find my bane for this girl; you'd need something as universally effective as the Lucky Charm that messed me up last time. Are you trying to tell me you have something like that?"

"In a sense, yes," said Erma. "Consider: didn't you tell us that, when you give someone the hiccups, you create a connection between that person and yourself?"

"Well, sure."

"Then there is something connecting you to each of my maidens," said Erma, "and also connecting you to the girl called Ladybug. That means that Electra and Ladybug are connected through you – and the Great Jinjin is certainly able, with that connection available to him, to trace it back to Ladybug's world and use it to summon her into this one. Then we would have not only her Lucky Charm – which is certainly able to find your bane – but also the only power in all the worlds that can destroy your akuma form. And I think that, if the Jinjin knew that you had remained in Electra longer than strict justice allowed, he would not forbid Ladybug to use that power – nor do I think that Ladybug, knowing how you escaped her the last time, would be likely to let you do so again.

"So you see, Singulto," she concluded, "the only sensible thing for you to do…"

But Singulto didn't need it spelled out. In a flash, it had emerged from Electra's bosom, and lay hovering before her in the air; in a second flash, it had warped out of her reality entirely, leaving the Queen of Light and her suddenly hiccup-free maiden alone in the throne room.

Electra took several deep, unbelieving breaths. "Thank you, Your Majesty," she whispered. "Thank you so much… but I don't understand."

Erma smiled. "Neither did Daylight, at first," she said, "when I replied to her questions about it. But it's really quite simple. You thought that the Jinjin meant you to, as he said, have the hiccups 'as long as there was breath in your body'. But the Jinjin didn't say that you would have them that long, or that he meant you to; all he said was that you might do so."

Electra's eyes widened in understanding, and Erma nodded. "Of course, he did mean you to think that he meant the other," she said. "That was the true essence of your punishment – for anticipation of an ill is often as painful as the ill itself, and to spend almost a full day expecting to have the hiccups forever seems to have caused you all the grief that was needed. And, indeed, it could have been a good deal more than a day; the true terms of the punishment, which of course you couldn't be told, were that Singulto should remain in you until you had shown that you understood your real reason for doing wrong, and were resolved to overcome that weakness in yourself. The Jinjin thought, and Singulto dearly hoped, that that might take weeks or even months – but I knew better," she said with a twinkle in her eye. "If there is one virtue in which all my maidens excel, it's swiftness."

Electra laughed aloud, and then laughed again at the hiccup that hadn't interrupted the first laugh. Then a thought struck her, and she grew suddenly grave. "What about Singulto, though?" she said. "It didn't seem to care much about justice; it just wanted to stay in me as long as it could – and now it's gone off to some other world. What if it finds some other maiden there, and does stay in her forever? Then we would be responsible for her unjust suffering, since we could have had the Jinjin summon Ladybug to destroy it, and instead we let it go."

"Yes, that's true," said Erma. "But what you're forgetting, Electra, is that you still have your connection to Singulto, and so do Daylight and the others who drank from it. Tititi-Hoochoo can use any one of those to trace its activities – and, if need be, to summon Ladybug and send her after it. So, since Singulto hasn't yet succeeded in doing anything gravely wrong, it is only just to allow it its liberty for the time being."

She raised a hand. "And now, Electra, I believe it is time for Sunlight to take her post at my side. If you would please go and fetch her?" She grinned. "And then you might stay and chat a bit with your other fellow-maidens; I'm sure they've missed the sound of your voice, lately."

Electra beamed, and curtsied, and passed swiftly from the room, radiant with happiness.


	9. Chapter 9: An Unproductive Rehearsal

**Chapter 9: An Unproductive Rehearsal (Anonymous writer, I'm very very adamant on remaining anonymous. I don't know if guys are allowed, if not, go ahead and delete it, no hard feelings lol. also for clarification, I'm going to keep their names omitted since I'm extra super paranoid and don't wanna cause people in the fandom to get angry lol)**

No one knew how it got there. All they knew was that it was there. I mean, it wasn't unusual for there to be a cup of water in a recording room in case someone's throat got dry. So, it went undiscussed. What was weird, however was the appearance of the cup. It was more of a chalice if anything. Then again, when they invited their friends to record, there was often an abundance of gothic paraphernalia left behind. They really hanged around an interesting crowd, didn't they?

As the two men entered the recording studio, the white-haired one went into the booth while the raven-haired one went to the control booth. They ran a few warm-ups and test recordings before finally going to record the song they had spent countless nights writing and creating an instrumental for. Just before they started, the younger one signaled for the elder to wait, putting on his headphones and saying into the mic "I'm gonna take a quick sip of water first!" The dark-haired male nodded and watched as his friend took a look at the chalice. He shrugged and dumped his water bottle into it. He admired the writing on it and the carefully crafted designs. It was a true work of art-

"Hey, are we gonna record or just watch you be an art critic?" The shorter huffed from the tech booth.

"R-right! Haha, sorry!" He laughed that simple, high laugh that he always had. The older would never admit it in a million years, but it made him smile on the inside hearing him laugh. He watched as the younger took a quick swig of water and step back up to the mic.

"Take one." The tired-sounding male called as he started the track. For once, they were recording a slow song, something they did less often. Regardless, he could use a good lullaby to take a nice mid-morning nap in the dark tech booth.

It started off normal, the younger smoothly singing the flowing lyrics for the first few lines without mistakes. Then the next bit came.

"And if I could-HIC!" The raven was jolted from his peaceful near-sleep. He groaned as he sat up.

"What was that…?" He yawned as he stopped the track.

"I-I don't-HUP!...know…" the light-haired one blushed as he kept a hand loosely wrapped around his mouth.

"Well, step away from the mic. It's hurting my ears."

"Can't you just-HIP! turn the volume down…?" He whined.

The blue-haired one grumbled and turned down the volume in the headphones.

The man in the recording booth whined as another spasm jolted him in the air. "Maybe the-HUP! water went down the wrong way...I'll just-HULP-UCK! Mm, drink some more." He picked up the glass and chugged the rest of the water in it, though it wasn't much. He was about to put the cup down when something caught his eye. He nearly spit out the water, coughing on it a little as he read the writing on the bottom.

"What-HIC-CUP! Is this so-HUP! sorcery!?" He screeched.

"Oi! Volume! My ears are bleeding here!" The elder complained.

"Hey, HIC! Check this-HUP! out!" He waved as he held the cup out so he could see through the window.

"The hiccup cu-dude just get back to recording." He rolled his eyes. He was never the type to believe in magic, much unlike the younger.

"What makes you-HUP! think I can record like-HIC! like this?!"

"I don't know, just figure something out so we can get this song out of the way!" He grumbled, trying to hide his festering blush.

"Hmph. Well, if-HUCK! If you're that-HIP-UCK! Ugh, adamant about-ULP! about it, then that's-HIC-HUP! ow, your problem!" He pouted through the fit of spams, hand on his hip while the other rubbed his throat and chest to soothe the beginnings of ache. The poor pale man was losing the fight against the onslaught of rough hiccups, having grown stronger and faster with the second drink from the cup.

The shorter in the tech booth cleared his throat, face red. "Just...give me the stupid cup." The younger did as he was told, leaving to get into the tech booth. Within the time he was in the hall outside both rooms, another loud hiccup reverberated through the hall, and the shorter groaned and crossed his legs. He did so just in time as the younger entered the room, handing off the cup.

"Alright." He sighed over the rapid hiccups. "So if this alleged 'hiccup cup' isn't a bullshit prank by one of our stupid bandmates, it'll be fine in half an hour. Just...stay in here and wait it out."

"'Kay-HICCUP!" He whined in discomfort as he plopped on the couch. He stretched out as the elder watched him, his chest popping in the air as another hiccup rocked him. The raven blushed and attempted to ignore the lean and fit figure in front of him, rendered helpless to the spasms that had no warning. He looked away to the lyric book and tried to make a few notes, but every time he came up with something, the thought left when another noise came from behind him.

"HIC! HICCUP! HUP! It's-HUP! Starting to-HULP! To hurt...HIC! Ow…" the younger complained.

You know what? Screw it. The elder rolled his office chair over to the younger, setting the notebook down and moving the headphones off of him and on the desk behind him. He rolled over to the taller and huffed. "This is only cuz you won't shut up about it hurting." He grumbled through a fierce blush. He looked down at the bright eyes looking up at him. They stared at him with innocence while the rest of him...oh shit, the rest of him...his mouth forced open with every sound, his throat sucked in each time, his soft hands rested on his chest that jumped without rest. The elder huffed again as his hand reached to join the younger's on his chest. The pale one looked rather surprised, but it was as if his hands held some magic ability that made it magically stop hurting. He watched as the man rubbed his hands up and down, in small circles that made the pale one close his eyes and hum softly around hiccups so loud, they seemed very out of place for the situation. The shorter never lost the redness in his face. Whenever the chest against his hand jolted, he looked away and felt his face heat up more.

"Y-Your sweater is soft…" The elder said out of nowhere.

"Hm? Oh thanks." He said, then stopped. "Ah! Half an hour is up!"

Well, now there was an entirely different problem. One that couldn't be waited out. The elder moved over to the desk to pick up the sweatshirt he brought and wrapped it around his waist. "Let's do this tomorrow. Your voice is probably all sore."

"Fair enough." The younger shrugged, but he knew the real reason without a doubt. He knew there was some major teasing for him to do.


	10. Chapter 10: Hiccup Cure Mayhem

**Chapter 10: ****Hiccup Cure Mayhem by PKMN37**

Singulto was fluttering through the sky, admiring the scenery. It saw curious creatures below, swinging in trees and challenging each other for dominance. It failed to notice a large, brown bird with long, colorful feathers sticking out the back of its head come up from behind. It snatched Singulto with its beak and flew toward the edge of the woods. It perched itself on a nearby tree and proceeded to attempt eating the iron moth. Not liking the taste or hardness of its prey, the bird released it and Singulto fluttered off, glowing in anger.

It spotted a familiar city and sat on top of a building. There were flowers everywhere and it saw a building ahead that had a red and white ball sign up front. It's antenna perked up in delight when it realized where it was. It landed in the Pokemon universe and this was Petalburg City. It reminisced on the many Pokemon trainers and Gym Leaders it gave hiccups to. It had been ages since it came here. Its nostalgia trip was interrupted by a voice below it.

"Beautifly, where are you? We have a Contest to practice for, remember?" shouted a girl in a red shirt, blue shorts, and red bandana. Singulto decided to stealthily follow her.

"What's that?" came a voice from behind it.

So much for stealth. It coated itself in sickly dark-purple substance and charged toward her.

"May, look out!" the voice cried out. Too late. By the time May turned around, Singulto disappeared into her chest.

"What was-_HICCUP!_" May blinked in surprise. "What was _hic!_ that, Max?"

"It didn't look like any pokemon I've ever seen," Max circled around her. "There's no trace of it. Since it vanished, it might've been a Ghost-type."

"A Ghost-Bug-Type combination?" Ash added.

"But it was made of metal, so maybe a Ghost-Steel-Type?" Brock asked.

"I've heard of a Ghost-Steel-Type, but not in this Region," Max said.

May rolled her eyes, "It doesn't _hic!_ matter. What matters _hic!_ is I've got a pokemon _hic!_ in my chest and _hic!_ I want it out."

"The professor might know what to do," Ash said.

The group traveled to the Pokemon Center and pulled up the video phone. Professor Oak appeared on screen. "Hi, Ash, what can I do for you?"

"Professor, do you know of a metallic, bug pokemon that can phase into people's chests and give them hiccups?" Ash asked.

Oak looked puzzled. "A metallic, bug pokemon that can phase into people's chests and give them hiccups?" He repeated.

"Yeah, it _hic!_ looks like a tiny _hic!_ version of Venomoth. _Hiccup!_" said May.

"I don't know of any pokemon that does that. I've heard of a legend that involves a magic cup that does something similar to that. You say it entered your chest?"

"_HICCUP!_ Yeah," May replied.

The professor thought for a moment. "If I know my Myths and Legends, the only way to get something like that out is with an unlikely cure."

"An unlikely cure?" Ash asked.

"Yes. Something conventional like drinking water or holding your breath won't work for something like this."

"Like eating a jar of honey?" asked Max.

"Or standing on one foot while singing a bad pop song?" Brock added.

"Perhaps," said Oak.

"I suppose I _HIC!_ could try a few _hic!_ of those," May said, uncertainly.

Later that day, May sat on the bench hiccuping every couple of seconds while waiting for her friends to return. She turned around to see Max carrying a jar of honey that was as big as he was.

"I hope you haven't eaten anything at all today," Max said.

"Ummm..._hic!_ do I have to _hic!_ eat ALL of that?" she asked.

"Yep," was Max's answer.

"_Hiccup!_ Oh, jeez…" she muttered. Max put the jar in front of her and popped it open. She got a large spoon and proceeded to eat. Five minutes later, the jar was empty and May was on the ground holding her bloated stomach. Each hiccup caused it to bounce.

Brock came back with a karaoke machine. He popped in a CD by Willow Smith and it started to play the song Whip My Hair.

"Anything but that song," muttered May.

"The professor said it had to be unconventional," said Brock.

May sighed and got up. She stood on one foot and Brock handed her the mic. Balance was difficult with a stomach full of honey and hiccups that threatened to knock her over but she somehow managed it.

"I whip my _hic!_ hair back and _hic!_ forth! I whip _hic!_ my hair back _hic! _and forth! _Hiccup! _I whip my _hic! _hair back a-_hiccup!_-nd forth!" She could hear Ash laughing as he arrived with Torkoal walking beside him. She threw down the mic and turned the music off. "Like you _hic!_ have a better _hic!_ Idea?"

"Well, it's unconventional," he answered. "Torkoal, Flamethrower!"

"WHAT?!" May yelled in surprise, before she was engulfed in flames. She was now covered in soot. "So you're _HIC! _idea was to burn _hic!_ me alive?!"

Ash chuckled, sheepishly, "Not my best plan, I suppose."

Max began to say, "Maybe we could-"

"Oh, no!" May interrupted. "I'll _hic!_ figure it out _hic!_ myself, thank you!" She turned to leave with Torchic when she saw a service stand that wasn't there before.

"Hello," said a woman with long red hair, glasses, and a lab coat that appeared from behind it.

"Welcome!" greeted a purple-haired man in a similar lab coat.

"We hear you have a hiccup problem," said a cat-like creature in glasses and a beaker in its hands.

"Yes. I _hiccup!_ can't get rid of 'em. _Hic! _I've tried everything. _Hic!_"

The three supposed doctors huddled and whispered to each other, then turned to May. "Do you have a Pikachu?" The purple-haired man asked.

"I do," replied Ash.

"Good," said the redhead. "Place it on the counter." Ash did so and Pikachu was put in a small cage. A small radar dish on top aimed for May. "This'll only hurt for a second."

The dish fired a strong electric shock at May. After she fell down, Singulto left her body, with sparks coming off of it.

"What is that?" asked the cat creature.

"Don't know," replied the redhead, "but whatever it is, we're taking it with us." The trio pulled off their disguises.

"Team Rocket!" Ash and friends exclaimed.

"Prepare for trouble!" Jessie exclaimed.

"Make it double!" added James.

"Let's not do this again!" May interrupted.

"Fine!" Jessie threw her pokeball and it popped open, releasing Dustox. "Dustox! Poison Sting!" The moth pokemon shot glowing needles out of its mouth.

"Torchic! Ember!" May commanded. Torchic shot orange, glowing embers. The poison sting and Ember attacks made contact, exploding on impact.

"Cacnea! Attack that metal thing! Use Pin Missile!" commanded James. The small cactus creature shot needles of light at Singulto, who proceeded to dodge the attack and charged at Cacnea, crashing into it and sending it flying toward James.

Singulto was surprised at its strength. It didn't know it could do that. What else could it do in this form? It focused its power and shot a beam of light at James and Cacnea, knocking them over.

"Dustox! Psybeam!" commanded Jessie. Dustox shot a mult-colored ray at Singulto, who shot its own beam. The two blasts of light pushed against each other for a couple of seconds before Singulto's gave out and it got hit. It fell to the ground in a daze. "Dustox! Get that metal thing!"

"No you don't! Mudkip! Water Gun!" shouted Brock. Mudkip shot water out of its mouth, which struck Dustox back.

"Treeko! Pound that cage!" Ash yelled. Treeko charged forward and used its tail to hit Piikachu's cage just right, freeing it.

Singulto got back up and shot a blast at Team Rocket, sending them back, to crash into their Meowth balloon.

"Pikachu! Thunderbolt!" shouted Ash. With one blast of electric energy, Team Rocket's balloon exploded, sending them all flying off into the distance.

"Looks like Team Rocket's blasting off again!" they shouted before disappearing into the sky.

"That takes care of them," commented May. "Hey, my hiccups are gone. Thank goodness. I don't think I could eat any more honey." The group laughed and proceeded to head to the next town.

Later, Team Rocket was busy fixing the balloon when Jessie noticed a fancy iron goblet sitting next to her. "What's this?"

"It looks like it's worth a fortune," said Meowth.

"Maybe you should check for leaks," suggested James.

Jessie shrugged, "Why not?" She grabbed a water bottle and filled the cup, taking a big drink. "It works fine. _HIC!_" She covered her mouth. "_Hiccup!_"

James and Meowth laughed and got hit with the goblet. "Shut _huck!_ up and get _hic! _back to _hic!_ work!" They continued the patch job with Jessie hiccuping and the goblet chuckling to itself.


	11. Chapter 11: A Bad Case of the Ink-Ups

**Chapter 11****: A Bad Case of the Ink-Ups by Lilalu**

It was a beautiful day in Inkopolis; the square was bustling, younger inklings and octolings were going to their turf wars and the older cephalopods were opening up shop at their jobs for the day. Pearl and Marina were two of these older cephalopods. They were walking over to Crusty Sean's food truck to get some breakfast and wake up a bit more before their first big news show of the day. After waiting in line a little, as Crusty Sean's did have some of the best and only food in the square, the two made their way up to the truck. Pearl got in front of Marina as the younger one cowered behind her, too shy to order, as usual.

"Oh hey, it's y'all! What's kraken?!" Sean punned in his trademark friendly, carefree tone. "What'll it be?"

"We'll have two Seanwiches, a Swim-Speed Apple drink for me and an Ink-Shoe Grape drink for her." Pearl put a few tickets on the desk and Sean took them.

"Yah, I'll fry some right up for ya." he always said he'd fry whatever he served, even if not all of it was prepared that way. After a few dozen seconds, he finished up the two orders, handing them both drink cups and sandwiches that sort of looked like hot dogs. "Bon appetit, friendos! Peace!"

Pearl and Marina took to the side of the food truck to eat their orders. Crusty Sean's food was very good, so they'd always eat their Seanwiches before taking in their drinks. The Seanwiches did make them thirsty, though, so Marina took a big sip of her drink right after finishing hers. However, something was a bit off about the way Marina's drink tasted and felt inside her that she couldn't really put her finger on. For that reason, she decided to ignore it.

"Man, Sean, your food is crazy fresh!" Pearl complimented the chef.

"Yeah, I don't even care that this is pretty much all the food we can get around here." Marina blushed, sheepishly agreeing with Pearl. "I love this stuf– *HIC!*"

Marina's hands instantly shot up to her mouth. She made a little noise of embarrassment before being confident enough to take her hands off. She was okay with having hiccups alone, but in a group setting?! This was torture for her!

"P-Pearlie… do you know *HIC!* how to get rid of hiccups..? *HIGK-UP!*" her hiccups were strong and loud, much unlike she was. Almost all of them sounded different.

"Oh yeah, totally! Sometimes I forget you don't get them as much as I do so I need to tell you how to get rid of them every time~"

"I have bad *HICCULP!* memory, okay?" Pearl laughed and Marina pouted, letting out another hiccup. "Just t-tell me what I need to do… *HYICK-UP!*"

"Well, all ya really need to do is go in and out of your octopus form. Usually fixes 'em right up! It always works for me, I think it's just something that has to do with your respiratory… something or whatever." Pearl explained and held her drink for her as Marina tried out the cure. Lo and behold, it worked like a charm! The octoling smiled and hugged her inkling friend tight.

"Thank you so much, Pearlie~!" Marina exclaimed happily. "You saved my life, I was so scared I was gonna have those hiccups through the entire news show… That would've been so embarrassing."

"Ya know I can't do these shows on my own, so I gotta do my best to keep ya sittin' next to me." Pearl threw an arm around her and assured her that she'd be by her side no matter what.

"Sorry about that, bro, the Ink-Shoe Grape can do that to ya." Sean added. "For reals dude, It's pretty sick that they're so easy to cure, at least."

After Marina and Pearl talked and drank a bit more of their drinks, though none of the cephalopods could see it, a little bit of drink vanished from Marina's cup. Why? She was drinking from the Hiccup Cup. It had found its way into Inkopolis, and had also found someone that it's magic did not work on. Of course, it was because Marina wasn't fully human; she was an octoling, and she had the ability to switch from breathing with lungs to gills and back. The cup figured out that it needed to absorb some of the drink in order to attain some liquid qualities, including effectiveness on gills, to actually set her into a hiccuping fit. As soon as Marina took in the very last sip… she hiccuped!

"O-oh no, I *HICCUP!* think they're back—*HIGK!*" she went red-faced and tried to look away from Pearl and Sean.

"Come on, enough with the theatrics." Pearl rolled her eyes. "Just do the switchy thing and throw the drink away. Your body obviously just wants to hiccup it all out."

Marina tried to switch back and forth into her octopus form, but she just couldn't stop hiccuping!

"Whoa…" Pearl watched her keep hiccuping. "Y'know, this is pretty weird."

"Usually *HIGK!* Ink-Shoe Grape drinks don't *HICCUP!* make me this hiccupy… *HIC-mk!*"

"Usually, cephalopods aren't this hiccupy… _ever._ Sean, did you accidentally put somethin' in her drink or something?"

"Well, I can get a little clumsy, but I dunno anything I'd have on me that'd give ya incurable hiccups." Sean responded, before starting to realize something. "Waiwaiwait, bro, couldja gimmie that cup you're holding?"

Marina gave Pearl the cup, who gave it to Sean. He looked closely at it and saw a small engraving on the bottom that made him finally realize the truth of the matter.

"Yyyyep." he nodded. "Looks like you took a drink from the hiccup cup."

"Wait, so this is *HIC!* some sort of practical *HILK!* joke." the hiccuping octoling sounded confused and a little upset.

"Not mine. I watched a documentary about this a little while ago. Said it was some sorta… shape-shifting cup that mysteriously hops from place to place and gives people incurable hiccups for thirty minutes if they drink from it. Or something like that." he explained. "So I think you just got unlucky, friendo."

"Th-thirty *HICCUP!* minutes?!" Marina looked terrified.

"Yep, thirty hiccup minutes." Sean replied, smiling. Pearl booed him.

"B-but the *HNK!* show starts in *HIC-ULK!* twenty! I can't do the *HIC!* whole thing like this! *HICCULP! HIGK!* Mmph…" she was red-faced and breathing heavily and erratically from anxiety, which actually made them worse.

"Rina! It's okay!" The older one hugged her again, trying to calm her down as they both walked over to the news studio; Sean was serving another customer. "Yeah, this is crazy weird, but we'll get through it!"

"Yeah, you're right..!" the octoling hiccuped as she threw the cup away. "There's *HICK!* got to be some *HILK!* way to cure them, right?"

"Hmmm…" Pearl wondered. "Got it! Let's do a turf war! The exercise'll get your breathing back in place!"

"B-but then *HIC!* won't everyone who's playing *HICCUP!* see me like this..?"

"Oh, they'll be too focused on the game to care! Now, what're we waiting for?" Pearl playfully asked, running to get into a turf war game.

As soon as they found a battle to compete in, the two looked around. Most of the people getting ready for the battle were kids, but there was one older inkling on their team of four, about Marina's age, who was paying a little more attention to his surroundings.

"Whoa, Pearl and Marina?!"

"The one and only~!" Pearl extravagantly signaled as Marina went red-faced and waved sheepishly, cowering behind her partner again and trying to hold her hiccups down as best she could. "What about you?"

"I'm Adrian!" he smiled, getting out a couple photos and a pen. "Can I have your autographs?"

"You got it!" Pearl put her autograph on her picture as Marina nervously smiled and nodded. "To… Adrian!"

After she was done, he turned over to Marina and she took the pen, desperately trying to hold in her hiccups.

"You're kinda quiet… what's wrong?" he asked her. "You didn't lose your voice right before the show or anything, did you? That'd be an inconvenience…"

"U-um, actually, I– *HILK!*" Marina got embarrassed about it again, but not really caring that much about it anymore, since he knew she had them now and there wasn't anything she could really do about it. "...have the hiccups… *HIC-ULP!*"

"W-well, why can't you just switch into your octoling form and back to fix them up?" Adrian asked, looking a little bit intrigued.

"Long story." Pearl filled in for her as Marina kept hiccuping, almost completely red in the face from having them in front of a fan.

"Well, either way, they actually sound pretty cute!" he said as Marina finished signing the autograph and he walked away, laughing.

"...C-cute? *HIC-mk!*" Marina blushed, looking a bit perplexed.

"See? It's not so bad! You're gonna get through it." Marina smiled at her before getting into battle position with her teammates.

"3! 2! 1! Go!"

"GAME!" Marina heard after the three minutes were up. "THE WINNERS ARE… VIOLET! ZANDER! STELLA! AND ARLO!"

"Well, we lost miserably… and everyone *HIC!* got to see my hiccups… *HIC-ULK!* and the cure didn't even work!" Marina pouted.

"C'mon, Rina! We still have…" Pearl looked at her watch. "...eleven minutes! We've got this!"

"Yeah! *HIC!* Maybe we should try some more *HIC-URK!* conventional cures, though." Marina suggested as Pearl went back to thinking. ...And thinking. ...And thinking.

...

"You have no *HIC!* idea what you're doing, *HICCUP!* don't you?" Marina concluded.

"Well, as much I _obviously_ know _exactly_ what I'm doing, obviously, we need to get to the studio." Pearl started dashing towards the news studio with Marina in hand. "Maybe someone there will know what to do!"

With only a few more minutes at their disposal, the duo tried everything they could to get rid of Marina's loud hiccups before the show started, but everything they attempted turned out to be a failure. Marina and Pearl were sitting backstage with 70 seconds left on the clock.

"So, we've tried handstanding, *HIC!* tickling, overeating, burping, *HIC-ULK!* drinking soda upside down, breath holding, *HILK!* nose plugs, earplugs, screaming, and tongue holding, and *HICCUP!* nothing has worked!" the octoling put her head into her hands. Pearl looked concerned and was actually starting to feel awful for her in a way she didn't feel often. She'd never seen someone hiccup as much as she was before. "Maybe there really *HIC-ULK!* isn't a way to cure these…"

"Rina…" Pearl went up a little close to the octoling and put her arms over her shoulders. "It's only one show… you've done so many! Everyone loves you–you're Marina Ida, for splat's sake! No one's gonna care about a couple of dumb little hiccups. You're great at this! You're just… letting your anxiety get to you."

Marina looked around and then back at Pearl, who was a little red in the face.

"Besides… I… kind of think you're cute when you're hiccuping."

Marina looked at Pearl surprised, both of them blushing a little bit, their eyes shifting around and little giggles and hiccups coming out every now and again.

"Alrighty, ladies!" a gruff voice from the big backstage speaker, a voice that belonged to their producers, alarmed them out of their blissful state. "You're on in 10 seconds!"

"Okay, sounds to me like we gotta get out there!" the older inkling quickly spoke, walking fast and dragging her friend along with her.

"What.. *HIC!* did you say..?" Marina wanted to make sure she wasn't dreaming; it looked like she had stars in her eyes.

"You know what I said." Pearl let her know as the two walked out on stage, sat down in their chairs, and the news theme started.

"Y'all know what time it is!" Pearl shouted as usual.

"It's Off the Hook, coming at you *HIC!* live from Inkopolis Square–!" Marina's voice sort of broke into playful laughter. She was acting less timid than usual. "I-I'm sorry, guys–! I've been *HICCUP!* battling a case of the *HILK!* hiccups! It's a long *HIC!* story, but I just haven't been able to *HICCUP!* cure them! Okay, I'm gonna try to *HYICK!* get through this!"

Pearl was thinking a little bit as she was laughing with her news partner. Could she really have helped her out with her self-confidence just like that, by giving her a tiny compliment? Either way, she wanted to keep going.

"Check it! Here are the current regular battle stages!" she said after recovering from some laughter. As the stages popped up, Marina hiccuped again and the duo both laughed. This went on for the whole two-minute news flash; Marina hiccuping constantly and them both bursting into laughter occasionally because of it.

"And that's all the time we've got!" Pearl told the audience. "Hopefully those hiccups stop sometime, Rina! Anyway, until next time…"

"Don't get cooked, stay off the hook!" the two said in unison, Marina being interrupted by a hiccup as the cameras turned off and the two were on their way. As they left the building, a few fans came up to the two, as was usual after the show, but a few particular things people said stood out to Marina.

"Those hiccups were so funny! You're so adorable!"

"You did such a good job powering through those hiccups!"

"It's so fun to watch you guys laugh over stuff like that!"

By the time they were out of that tiny mob, Marina was smiling wide, seeming extremely happy at how things turned out in spite of the hiccups.

"See, I told ya it's not so bad and you're gonna get through it!" Pearl hugged her, Marina reciprocating a hug back.

"Pearlie… you wanna *HIC!* find somewhere to sit down? *HICULP!* I wanna talk~" Marina asked, and within a little while, they found a bench in a quiet place where they wouldn't be spied on by anyone.

"When you said *HICCUP!* my hiccups were cute… *HIGK-ULP!* did you really mean it?" Marina asked her, plain and simple. "Or were ya just trying to *HIC!* make me more comfortable with it *HICCUP!* because that guy said it and you wanted me *HILK!* to believe it?"

"...Listen, here's the deal… I've been dying to let you know a couple things... for a while." Pearl wanted to come clean to her. "I… have a hiccup kink. Just, first off."

"H-huh?" the octoling asked.

"Not a big one or anything! Just… I guess it makes me feel a little tingly whenever you have hiccups…or when I have them and you tease me about it by being sassy… you're really cute with them and I feel really cute with them because of you. Y'know? It's just something I think is adorable…"

"Well… that's *HICCUP!* fine~! You know that I'm sort of *HIC!* into all the machinery and stuff *HIC-URK!* because I grew up around it~ *HIC-MK!* I guess if I'm not weird, you aren't *HILK!* either!" they sat and just kept looking at each other sweetly. "Pearlie… *HIC!* would you... believe me *HIC-CUP!* if I told you I've had this… *HIC!* massive crush on you *HUP!* for a really long time now *HIC!* because I've always admired your *HICCUP!* strength and confidence..?"

Pearl looked down and saw that they started holding hands without either of them noticing.

"Y-yeah, I guess I would~" she responded, scooting a bit closer to her and hugging her a little. "Would you believe me if I told you I've always thought you were an insanely gorgeous beauty with an adorable, super awesome personality to match?"

"S-stop! *HICCULP!* You're making me *HIC!* blushy~!" Marina hugged her right back, letting her feel the octoling's hiccups. "B-but, I suppose I would *HIC-UCK!* too~"

In this moment, the two found themselves close to each other. Their faces were looking at each other, and all of this just seemed like the perfect moment. Pearl went in and planted a kiss on her partner's lips. After a bit, they wanted some more. They started to make out on the bench, hugging each other close and letting out little, tiny noises occasionally. Eventually, they broke the kiss.

"Thanks for saying that about my hiccups earlier, Pearlie… it really helped me out~" Marina broke the silence.

"Hey, I said it once, I'll say it again. I can't do these shows on my own, so I gotta do my best to keep ya sittin' next to me." Pearl threw an arm around her and assured her that she'd be by her side no matter what. "Oh– Rina~! I think they're gone!"

"W-wait, really?!" Marina smiled wide, realizing something. "Y-your kiss must have cured them!"

"I mean, that or it could've just been the end of the 30 minutes." Pearl rolled her eyes.

"You wanna just... pretend... that it was the kiss..?"

"...Okay." Pearl shrugged and threw her arms around her partner, who threw her arms back around her.


	12. Chapter 12: Hiccups on the High Seas

**Chapter 12: Hiccups on the High Seas **

Once again in its long search, the magic cup had found another new universe of interest. This one was filled with pirates and other sea adventures galore. Singulto had seen similar places before, such as Shantae's world, but this one had its own unique peculiarities...and females.

As for the aforementioned inhabitants, the pirate Straw Hat crew were continuing on their voyages, feeling closer to their goal of the mysterious 'One Piece' treasure. They were arriving at a port of meet up with Vivi, Princess of the desert Alabasta kingdom for her to become a full member of the crew.

While saying farewell to her friends and family before going off with the Straw hats, Vivis men brought in a large barrel from their brewery onto the ship. Nami especially looked forward to trying that.

In celebration for her arrival, a feast was held. Luffy of course stuffed his face the most, though the girls had managed to put a bit of a belly from their eating that popped through their tops and lower garments.

"I still think your pleasant on the eyes," Sanji complimented as he went around the table. Nami merley scoffed at that.

"I'm curious about getting a taste that barrel myself," Zoro said, little did he know other plans were about to unfold with it.

The girls soon left the dinner and were hanging out in another room "Nice to have another fellow woman onboard," Nami said

"Thank you for having me, it's a pleasure" Vivi replied before emitting a "Uurup! Oh, excuse me" She blushed putting a hand to her mouth "Must of been the food."

"Ah no need to be so formal" Nami ensured before letting out a loud belch of her own.

Robin wasn't one to be quite as crude but not wanting to be the one left out she put a fist over her hand, letting out a stifled burp. "So, I assume we're onto the 'really fun part?" She asked.

Nami nodded before getting out the keg. "Thanks for the gift."

"It was no problem really" Vivi smiled as they went to fill some glasses with its content. Singulto had to use all its will not to shake in excitement of what was about to unfold.

Nami had the first go chugging hers "Ahh, that's the stuff. *Huck!" Her eyes widened in surprise as her body racked a few more times.

Nico Robin gave a smirk "Guess you can't hold down you're liquor as well as you thought?" She took a drink of hers, but after a moment a *Hup" emitted from her body.

"What the hell?" Nami exclaimed.

Vivi looked between them and nervously at her cup. Well she went all the trouble to get this onboard she thought taking a gentle sip of hers hoping that would save her. "*Hic!" 'Oh guess not' She thought.

"What the *Hhuick! is in this stuff?!" Nami examined her glass.

"Hmm.." Robin pondered as she went to inspect the barrel "There's some kind of *Hulck message written here, translates to the HIC...cup Keg. The rest is *hULP a bit hard to decipher."

"Never heard of that before. *HICK" Nami responded.

"Perhaps it's *Hi-ulp, some kind of item from the void century *Ulp" Robin theorised.

"I'm sorry, please forgive for *Hic! *HIC! bringing it aboard" Vivi said timidly

"Hey, you couldn't of *HICCUP known," shrugged Nami.

"Should we ask for *Heek..elp?" Vivi asked. "I don't really want to bother anyone like this.

"*HUP!" was Nami's reply.

"*Huuk, ofph this is not a good combination with what we eat," Nico Robin said patting her sticking out belly.

The hiccups shook the three females stomachs, as well as another body part, which Vivi was now holding still with her hands.

"Sigh I need a drink *Hiek!" said Nami.

Vivi turned to face Nami "You sure you want to *Hic-ulp drink anymore of that?"

"Meh" She merely said before downing some more. "*Hic!"

Twenty minutes past and the room was still filled with the sound of three hiccuping pirate women. They had tried various means to cure each other such as helping someone stay upside down, they had some fun with some Flower Flower fruit messages but to no avail.

Soon Chopper came across their room overhearing and they decided to get checked up. He had a stethoscope on Nami's stomach her hiccups caused in go inwards then plop out. "Hmm, well I see what's going on, you have hiccups," Chopper stated.

"Gee ya think? *HIC!" Nami sarcastically replied it seemed her hiccup got loud with her annoyance. The reindeer rushed out at that.

"Well, good *Hipple night" Vivi said tucking in.

"Night Hic-uh.." Nami replied.

The women struggled to rest with their hiccups but managed to. The next morning thankfully they were gone. They decided to be rid of that barrel, unaware that Singulto had departed during the night. In any case Zoro was disheartened to not try a taste.


	13. Chapter 13: The Hiccup Before Christmas

**Chapter 13: The Hiccup Before Christmas by PKMN37**

Singulto fluttered through the midnight sky as it watched the snow cover the rooftops below. It just got here but it knew what time of the year it was; Christmas Eve. It always enjoyed the feeling of Christmas. The beautiful Christmas trees that lit up the houses, the taste of eggnog, the music, the movies, and Santa himself. It descended into a nearby park and checked out the light show. Not long after it finished exploring the park, it heard voices nearby. It flew over and spotted a group of people carrying boxes of decorations to a Camper.

"Thanks for coming over for Christmas, kids," said a large, elder man.

"No, problem, Grandpa," replied the teenage boy in a green jacket. "It's always fun decorating the Rust Bucket."

"It'll be the first time Kevin and Julie are here," said the red-headed girl. "Ben, you start on the tree, I'm going to make my famous eggnog."

As it stealthily got closer, it saw Ben fiddling with his watch and slam his hand on it. In a bright, green flash, he transformed into a slim, sleek creature with balls on his feet. The creature proceeded to cover the tree in lights at great speed.

Singulto snapped back to attention when the Rust Bucket door opened up. It quickly and quietly flew to the entrance before the door closed. It landed next to a stack of cups and transformed itself.

"I hope you didn't forget the nutmeg this time, Gwen," said Ben, from outside.

"Don't worry, I remembered," said Gwen, rolling her eyes. She put on an apron and started to make her eggnog.

As Gwen was making the eggnog, something hit the RV and a bottle of dish soap on the top shelf tipped over, spilling its contents into the Hiccup Cup.

"Damn it, Ben!" shouted Gwen, as she caught the ingredients about to fall off the side of the table.

"Sorry!" came a gruff voice from outside.

Gwen sighed and grabbed the Hiccup Cup. She filled it with milk and downed it before getting back to work. As she started to stir the eggnog, "Hiccup!" she hiccupped and a stream of bubbles escaped her mouth.

"Interesting. Hiccup!" She watched as more bubbles appeared. She looked at the cup and saw the German writing below. She smiled and took another drink.

"It's been a while, Gwen," the Cup said.

"Hic! It sure has. Hic! Where've you been? Huck!"

"Around," it replied. "Just thought I'd stop by for Christmas."

"The bubbles hic! are new."

"Liquid soap."

"Hic! Cool. So will you stick hic! around for the festivities? Hup!"

"Only if your famous eggnog is involved," it joked.

Gwen laughed and hiccupped a large bubble.

"So is it almost ready?" It asked.

"All it hic! needs now is a bit huck! of ginger." She began to stir it in.

"Excellent. I'll just camp out here if that's okay."

"Sure," replied Gwen. She hiccupped loudly and produced another large bubble.

"So I got a new transformation the other day."

"That's cool. Hic! What is it?"

"A keg. A witch gave me the new form. Now I can affect multiple people simultaneously. Unfortunately, I can only use it three times a week and at night. I just used it up yesterday."

"Oh, that's huck! too bad."

"Yeah. Magic, go figure," the cup sighed.

"Hic! Speaking of magic, it hic! turns out I'm not a witch. Hic! I'm half mana alien."

"Sounds cool," said the cup.

"Meh. I honestly hiccup! liked the idea of being a witch hic! better. It's like one of those annoying hiccup! retcons creators like to do hic! with their stories later on. Huck! It would be like Hagrid hiccup! saying to Harry, 'You're a hic! wizard, Harry', only to tell him in hic! the second book, 'You're an alien, Harry.' HIC!"

The cup laughed, "Don't even get me started on the J.K Rowling problem. ' Dumbledore is gay. Hermione is black.' Ai-yi-yi."

"I know, right," Gwen agreed.

"Gwen, who are you talking to?" came a familiar voice from behind her.

She turned around and saw Kevin looking at her funny.

Gwen's face went bright red. "N-nothing! No one! Hic! I'm not weird! Hic! You're weird!"

Kevin chuckled, "Okay. Always a fun time with the Tennysons," he said as went over to the couch.

The cup chuckled, "Smoothe. Not awkward at all."

"Shut up," grumbled Gwen, as she went back to finishing her recipe.

The cup continued, "Well, you can still talk to me. Mana is technically magic, right?"

"Yeah?…"

"So, in a way, you're still kind of a witch."

Gwen smiled, "True. Hic! Thanks."

"No problem."

The RV door opened and Julie entered, Hi, Gwen," she greeted. "Merry Christmas."

"Merry hiccup! Christmas, Julie," Gwen greeted. "Hiccup! Hiccup!"

Julie watched the bubbles floating in front of her. She smirked and asked, "Interesting case of hiccups you got there. What did you drink?" She whispered, "I want some."

Gwen laughed, "It's a lo-huck-ng story. Join Kevin on the couch, HICCUP! I just finished making hic! the eggnog." She subtly pointed to the cup behind her.

"Sure, I just need to get a drink first." She winked and grabbed the cup off the counter. She saw the writing on the bottom and smiled. The last time she saw this cup was last year, when she got a bad case of hiccups during a date with Ben. She saw some dish soap sitting at the bottom, added more, poured some eggnog in, and went to sit down.

"Hic! So, how are you hup-eep! and Ben doing? Hiccup!" Gwen asked.

"Oh, you know him," she took a drink. "Media loves him, he loves them. HEEK!" Two big bubbles floated before her. She laughed and hiccupped more.

"Maybe I should skip the eggnog," said Kevin.

"Hik! Oh, come on," Julie insisted, trying to hand Kevin the cup. "It's fun. HEEKUP!"

"No thanks," he replied.

"Hey, everybody," greeted Ben, as he came in.

"Hey, Ben," greeted Julie. "Huck-eek!"

"Hiccups, again?"

"HICCUP!" went Gwen.

Ben smiled, "You too, huh? What'd you two drink?"

"Heek! Hiccup juice? HIK!" Julie joked and hiccupped a large bubble that popped in front of Ben.

"I wouldn't drink that eggnog, dude," warned Kevin.

Julie laughed, "Don't worry. Hik! It wasn't the eggnog. HEEKUP! I don't know what it Hik! was but you're safe. Huck-eek!"

"Really?" asked Kevin, deadpanned.

"Relax, Kev," said Ben, "I'll be the guinea pig." He grabbed a cup and took a drink of the eggnog. He smirked and did a loud, fake hiccup. "Hic! Oh no, Kevin!" he said, mockingly. "Now I've hic! got the hiccups, too!" He swayed back and forth then landed with an overdramatic flop next to Julie, arms flailing in the air. "Oh, the hic! humanity!"

Gwen and Julie laughed while Kevin rolled his eyes.

"Hilarious," Kevin droned, sarcastically, "now if you'll excuse me, I'm getting a drink."

After Kevin got up, Gwen passed a plate of Rice Krispie treats. Julie took another drink and hiccupped again before handing the cup to Gwen, who smiled and took another drink out of it.

"I HIC-AH! vote we watch Rankin hic! Bass Rudolph," said Gwen.

"Bad Santa," said Ben.

"Hik! Elf," said Julie.

"Whatever," said Kevin.

"How about we vote with bubble size?" suggested Ben.

"You're kidding, right?" asked Kevin.

"Nope," said Ben, "here are the rules: small bubbles are Rudolph, medium bubbles are Bad Santa, and large bubbles are Elf. Ready? Begin!"

Each hiccupped but not as fast as Ben thought they would. "Let's speed this up," he said and began tickling them.

"Ben! No! HAHAHAHA!-HIC! HIC! HICCUP! HAHA! HIC! HICCUP! HAHA! HICCUP! HAHAHA! HICCUP!"

"HEEHEE! HIK! HIK! HUCK-EPP! HAHAHA! HUCK-EPP! HEEHEEHEE! HIK! HIK! HIK! HUP-EEP! HAHAHA-HIK!"

After the tickling was done, Ben counted the bubbles, "Twelve small, fifteen large, and seventeen medium. Bad Santa wins."

Both girls were trying to catch their breath and slow down their hiccups.

"Hic! Well, hic! Th-hic! That wa-hic! was hic! Hic! Gimme a hiccup! a minute hic! and I'll hiccup! be right hic! with you. Hiccup!"

"Hahah! Heek! Remind me heek-eek! to try heek-eek! that the hik! hik! the next hik! time hik! Ben gets huck-eek! the hiccups. HIK!"

Once their hiccups calmed down, they joined Ben and Kevin on the couch. The girls took turns getting refills. Ben was sandwiched between the girls and was rocked side to side throughout the movie by their hiccups.

"How about heek! a game of charades? Hik!" suggested Julie.

"Okay, hic! I'll go first. Hic!" Gwen put up an index finger to indicate the first word. She got down on all fours and started grazing. Second word. Cat-like sound.

"A hiccuping cat-cow!" shouted the cup, though no one but Gwen could hear it. Gwen stifled a laugh.

"A mental patient," Kevin joked.

"Spongebob acting like Gary on Opposite Day!" shouted Ben.

"Correct!" shouted Gwen.

"That was my second guess," the cup moped. Gwen rolled her eyes and smiled.

Next, it was Julie's turn. First word: fat. Second word: duck. Third word: headache.

"Fat Daffy Duck with a migraine?" the cup said.

"A jackel?" said Ben.

"What?!" Said Kevin, looking at Ben. "It's Psyduck!"

"Correct! Hik!" shouted Julie.

"How did I not know that one?" the cup asked.

After a few more rounds, the cup made a suggestion to Gwen about dancing. "How hic! about a Christmas Eve hic! dance? We'll have to do hiccup! it outside but we'll have hic! Grandpa Max's bonfire for light," suggested Gwen.

"Oooh, hik! how romantic. Heek!" said Julie.

Everyone got themselves ready and head outside, except for Gwen, who volunteered to pick the music to play on the Rust Bucket's outdoor speakers.

"What do hic! you suggest?" Gwen asked the cup.

"How about some Christmas Jazz? Maybe some Christmas Lo-fi," It said.

Gwen set her Ipod up and connected it the speaker system. "Would hup! you like to come? Hic!"

"I don't know what I'd do," It said.

"Hiccup! You could act as a hup! beautiful, butterfly hair hic! clip," she suggested.

"That works." It turned into Singulto and perched itself on her head, then it weaved its legs into her hair. "I'm ready."

Gwen started the playlist and went outside, "Hey, guys. HICCUP!"

"Hey, Gwen," greeted Max, as he stoked the fire.

Christmas Jazz played as Gwen danced with Kevin. Julie held mistletoe over Ben's head and they kissed for a few seconds. When they pulled away, Ben hiccupped a few bubbles.

"Ready?" Gwen asked.

"Sure," he replied and they frenched. It was an interesting feeling as Gwen hiccupped into him. It was a combination of the quick suction of her hiccups and Kevin swallowing her bubbles. After he pulled away, he noticed Singulto on her head, hiccuping as he commented, "Hic! I like your hic! clip."

"Thanks," Gwen said, blushing,"Hiccup! It was a gift from hup! an old friend." If Singulto could smile, it would.

After dancing for a while, they joined Grandpa Max by the fire and toasted marshmallows. Then they had more eggnog and Julie and Kevin got ready to leave. Kevin got in his car and started it up.

"I had such a wonderful time. Thanks for having us over," said Julie. "And thanks for the awesome concoction," she whispered.

"Anytime. Merry Christmas, Julie," said Gwen. After they left and Ben headed to the bathroom, Gwen turned to Singulto, who was sitting on the counter. "Do you really have to go?"

"I must," it relented, "but I had a wonderful time. Thank you for having me. It's always great to celebrate with friends. Merry Christmas, Gwen." With that, it flapped its wings at a high speed and vanished.

"Merry Christmas, Singulto."


	14. Chapter 14: The Hiccuping Banshee

**Chapter 14: The Hiccuping Banshee by PKMN37**

Singulto found itself deep in the woods. It was dark and slightly chilly but serene. It flew through the trees, avoiding animals that would mistake it as prey. It didn't need a repeat of what happened back at the Pokemon World. It heard a rustling below and saw what looked like tiny men. It followed them to a shabby shack and looked through the window. It saw Dipper Pines and his twin sister, Mabel, preparing jack-o-melons. Oh yeah, Summerween, Gravity Falls' extra Halloween celebration. It watched as everyone gathered in the living room.

The two ran outside to place their lit up melons on the porch. As they did so, Singulto entered their residence and perched itself next to a collection of disposable cups, transforming itself into one. Mabel picked it up and got some punch. Before she could drink some, Grunkle Stan called them over.

"Before we start setting up the party, let's tell some ghost stories. Soos, turn out the lights." Soos did so and plugged in a fake campfire. "It's time to tell the tale of the Hiccuping Banshee."

"This'll be good," the cup said, though no one could hear it.

"A long time ago, there was a girl with chronic hiccups. It seemed no one could cure her. Years went by and she grew accustomed to them, not thinking much of it."

"This sounds familiar," the cup thought to itself.

"One day, she met a man who proclaimed his love to her. Little did she know, he didn't love her. He wanted her family's fortune. There was one problem…"

"Her hiccups?" The cup asked.

"Her hiccups, they drove him mad. At the wedding on Summerween, he snapped and shoved her, accidently knocking her head against the edge of the table, killing her instantly. Some say they can hear a maiden's hiccups echo in the night. If you hear her, that means she's found a victim. Fortunately, that doesn't happen very often. She only goes for those with incurable hiccups. Once she finds them, she drags them off into the night."

The cup sighed and said, "Thank God, ghosts don't exist."

Mabel took a drink and said, "I bet Dipper will get hiccups tonight. _Huckup!_" She laughed before hiccuping again. "Looks like _huck!_ I got 'em. _Huckle!_" She finished her beverage and got up to get a refill. By the time Grunkle Stan told the final tale, Mabel had a fourth refill it was time to set up the party.

Later, the guests started gathering outside and buying their tickets from Wendy. Mabel came outside and gave her the cup.

"You gotta _huckup!_ try out this punch. It's _huck!_ so good." Said Mabel.

"Okay," said Wendy and she gulped it down. "That's pretty good._ Hiccup!_ Oops. Got the _hiccup!_ hiccups, again. _Hiccup! Hiccup!_"

Mabel laughed, "Maybe_ huck!_ something's in the air."

"_Hiccup!_ Would you mind _hiccup!_ handling the tickets? I'm gonna get _hiccup!_ a refill. _Hiccup!_"

"Sure." Mabel took her spot and Wendy stepped inside.

As Wendy finished her fourth drink, she saw Pacifica enter.

"Hey, dude. _Hic-cup!_ Welcome to the _hiccup!_ party."

Pacifica laughed, "You both have hiccups? How quaint."

"What? You've _hic!_ never had hiccups?" asked Wendy, taking another drink. "_Hiccup!_"

"Never. Hiccups are for commoners," laughed Pacifica.

Mabel came in and Wendy handed her the cup. Wendy went back outside and Mabel was about to get another drink when she noticed the writing on the bottom. She remembered reading about this from Dipper's journal and smirked, filling it up and handing it to Pacifica.

"_Huckup!_ Try our punch. Best _huck!_ in Gravity Falls."

Pacifica scoffed, "Whatever. It can't be that good."

"It's _huck!_ got real kick," Mabel said, trying not to snicker.

"I doubt it," She gulped it down. "My servants make better. _Heekup!_" Squeeked Pacifica. She blushed furiously before hiccuping again. "_Heekup! Heekup!_"

Mabel laughed, "Oh my god! _Huck!_ That's adora-_huck!_ adora-_huck!_ so cute!"

Pacifica growled, "I bet _heek! heek!_ you're responsible for this. _HEEKUP!_"

"_Huck!_ Don't be silly. _Huckup!_ Why would I do a thing _huckup!_ like that?" She asked, winking.

Pacifica tried to keep her mouth shut but her hiccups wouldn't let her. "_HEEK!_" Doing so only caused her to hiccup louder each time her mouth popped open. "_HEEKUP! HEEKUP!_" People were starting to stare and she grew red in the face. She ran to the punch bowl and took another drink, which was followed by another hiccup. "_HEEKUP!_" Frustrated, she growled, threw the cup down, and rushed out the door. "You'll pay for this!_ HEEKUP! HEEKUP! HEEKUP!_"

Mabel laughed, picked up the cup, and went to get another drink. Several drinks later, Mabel's belly sloshed around from all the punch. She watched as it bounced around like a water balloon under her sweater with each hiccup. She laughed which brought on an onslaught of hiccups. "_Huck! Huck! Huck! Huck! Huckup! Huckup! Huck! Huck!_"

Dipper was upstairs in their bedroom, looking through his journal. He found the page describing The Hiccuping Banshee but there was no picture. The entry read: From the information I've gathered, a strange ghost wanders Gravity Falls in search of hiccups. The purpose is unknown. Perhaps it uses them as a power source. The most I've caught of it is its ghostly tail and heard a TWAP as it quickly disappeared.

"I wish there was more information," Dipper sighed. As he closed the book, he heard hiccups echoing around him and Pacifica screaming outside. Before he had a chance to see what was going on, the screaming stopped and she was gone.

As Mabel finished another cup, Dipper bumped into her, which caused extra sloshing and bouncing. "_Huck!_ Hey, Dipper, what's _huck!_ up?"

"You didn't hear the screaming?"

"Screaming?"

"Nevermind. Pacifica's in trouble. Let's go." He grabbed her hand and they ran out the door, with Mabel dropping the cup. It turned into Singulto and followed them.

They stopped at the ticket table only to see Wendy was missing, too.

He turned to Mabel. "Did Wendy have the hiccups, too?"

"Yeah, why?" Her eyes went wide. "Oh…oops. _Huck-eek!_"

"Whaddaya mean 'oops'?"

"_Huck!_ I found the cup _huck!_ in your journal and shared it _huck-eek!_ with her and Pacifica. _Huck!_"

"Crap! I think the Hiccup Banshee got them."

"Well, _huck!_ now what?"

"Did you drink from it?"

"Yeah," Mabel replied, uncertainly. "Why? _Huckup!_"

"I think it travels via portals. You'll need to be bait."

"Why don't you _huck!_ be the bait?"

"I don't think it works on guys."

Mabel sighed and hiccupped, "Fine, but you _huck!_ better stay close. _Huck-eek!_"

They wandered through the woods for 10 minutes before they heard ghostly hiccups echo through the trees.

The twins stood back to back as the sound got closer. Singulto stayed close by, waiting for the opportune moment. The ghost appeared the moment Mabel turned her head and wrapped itself around her. Singulto saw its chance and latched itself onto Dipper's arm as he grabbed Mabel's leg before he was pulled into a portal. Just as fast as they disappeared, they reappeared in a pocket dimension.

The ghost placed Mabel next to Pacifica and Wendy, who were still hiccupping away, and placed Dipper on a floating rug next to them. Singulto detached itself from Dipper and fluttered toward the ghostly figure.

It looked like a young woman in a wedding dress. Her hair was long, golden and it floated in the air as if she was underwater. She had eyes as blue as the sea.

"Your aura is familiar but your shape is new," the ghost said, with a slight echo.

"We met long ago," Singulto said.

"Hiccup Cup, it's been too long," she giggled.

"**That's** the Hiccup Cup?" Asked Dipper, as he began to update the journal.

"Yes, what's your name?" the ghost asked.

"Dipper. That's my sister Mabel and you've met my friends. So what's your name?" Dipper asked.

"Honestly, I can't remember. I haven't needed my name in 500 years," the ghost said.

"How about we call you Ban?" Singulto suggested.

"I like it," she said. "Ban, it is."

"You're the only one who can hear me so could you…"

"No problem." With a wave of her hand, the ghoul granted Dipper, Wendy, Mabel, and Pacifica the ability to hear the Singulto's words.

"Now that I have your attention, let me explain what's going on. 510 years ago, I met a girl who wanted a case of hiccups that wouldn't just disappear. I told her there was a way and she said she was willing to do it. I warned her that unlike my standard Hiccup Spell, which while incurable is only temporary, this is permanent. It's called the Hiccup Curse."

"The Hiccup Curse?" Dipper asked, as he started to update info on the Hiccup Cup.

"Yes. It's accomplished by filling me up and taking a small sip, every hour, for 12 hours. Once the ritual was done, I left Gravity Falls for another world. Only when I came back tonight, did I learn of her tragic fate."

"_Huckup!_ So she's the one in Grunkle _huckle!_ Stan's tale?" Asked Mabel.

"Exactly."

"_HEEKUP!_ I'm not surprised. _Heekup!_" Said Pacifica.

Singulto turned to Ban and said, "Sorry for what happened to you."

"Nah, it wasn't your fault. My husband-to-be was the monster, not you."

"So what are you going to do to us?" Asked Dipper.

"Are you _heekup!_ going to kill us? _Heekup!_" Said Pacifica.

Ban laughed, "Kill you? My, my, what a reputation I've developed. No. You see I absorb incurable hiccups, whether magically or naturally afflicted."

"_Hic!_ You take people's _huck!_ hiccups?" Asked Wendy.

"In short, yes."

"What do _huck!_ you do after you _huckup!_ take them?" Asked Mabel.

"I have the ability to pass them on but I usually keep them for myself."

"So what do you do with your victims once you take their hiccups?" Asked Dipper.

"I wipe their memories and put them back where I found 'em." The ghost stretched out her hand and energy began to flow out of the girls and into her. Once she was done, she smiled and said, "Delicious. _Hic!_ Pardon me."

"Finally, they're gone," sighed Pacifica.

"I dunno. I kinda like 'em," said Mabel.

"Weirdo," replied Pacifica.

"So is this hiccup ghost thing part of the curse?" Dipper asked Singulto.

"It's possible," replied Singulto. "I've only enacted the Hiccup Curse twice. Once with Ban and the other with another girl 300 years ago. People rarely want a permanent case."

"Sorry for all the trouble. Take care," said Ban, smiling.

Before Ban sent them home, Dipper quickly finished writing down new info on the Hiccuping Banshee. He saw a blinding flash of light and, when he regained his senses, he was standing in the woods. The sun was beginning to rise. Summerween was over.

"What am I doing here?" He asked himself and turned around to see Mabel staring at him. He screamed and fell backwards.

Mabel laughed, "Sorry, bro, I couldn't resist."

"Very funny," he said, sarcastically, dusting himself off.

Mabel's laughter was cut short by a sharp hiccup, which caused her to start laughing again. "_Huck! _Looks like I've got_ huck!_ the hiccups again. _Huckup!_"

"We should head back the Mystery Shack to see what's up," said Dipper and they both headed off. Singulto watched from a distance before disappearing.


	15. Chapter 15: Don't Drink the Milk

**Chapter 15: Don't Drink The Milk by PKMN37**

Singulto fluttered through the skies of Johto, watching the countryside pass below it. As it did, it saw a herd of Miltank and a thought occurred to it. Could it transfer its power through another? Only one way to find out. It landed near a water spigot and turned into a big plastic cup. The farmer saw it and filled it up, giving it to one of the Miltank, who guzzled it down. It felt strange. Its face started getting red and it began to wobble around. After the farmer left, a Jynx came by to sneak some MooMoo Milk. It filled a bucket and guzzled it down. It felt strange and started hiccuping.

"_Hiccup! _Jynx. Jyn-_hic! Hiccup!_ Jynx. Jynx. _Hiccup!_" It stumbled back into the grass and started wandering back home. Not far from it, was a trainer. It ambushed her from behind, kissing her. The girl screamed, causing the Jynx to run off.

As the Jynx fled, the girl started hiccuping. "_HICCUP! HIC! HICCUP!_"

"Interesting," thought the Cup. It turned into Singulto and flew off to catch up with the Jynx.

Two hours later, Ash, Misty, and Brock arrived at MooMoo Farm.

"Ya know, I've heard they've got the best MooMoo Milk here. Very rich and nutritious," said Brock.

Ash looked around and saw a drunk-looking Miltank. "That one looks promising." He rushed over and his friends weren't far behind.

The farmer didn't see Ash but he saw his friends and rushed out to stop 'em. "Hold on, there!" He hollered.

Misty and Brock stopped in their tracks as the man approached.

"What's up?" Asked Misty.

"If you want a drink, you're free to have some but don't drink **any** from Milly."

"Why? What's wrong?" Asked Brock.

A "_Hic!_" was heard where Milly was and they turned around to see Ash, stumbling around and snickering, "Thash some _hic!_ good shtuff. _Hic!_"

"I don't know but whatever it is, it's affected your friend," replied the farmer.

"Damn it, Ash," muttered Misty.

Nurse Joy arrived with a medical kit and the farmer told her of Milly's strange behavior. She went over and poured some milk from her into a cup and started analyzing it.

"Hmmm...nothing odd about the color." She stuck a thermometer in. "Temperature's normal." She sampled it and a strong tipsy feeling washed over her. "_Hic!_ Tashte and texshure ish _huck! _normal." She put the remainder in a test tube and struggled to stand up straight. She went back to the farmer and said, "I'm gonna _hic!_ Take thish back and have it ana-_hiccup!_ analyzhed." She giggled and muttered, "Heehee. Anal. _Huck!_" She slowly stumbled down the road back to the Pokemon Center.

"You two better watch your friend here. I don't think he can make it to Olivine City on his own," said the farmer.

Misty and Brock sighed as they grabbed Ash's hands and led him out of the farm. As they approached the city, they saw Officer Jenny wearing a helmet and two Growlithe standing in front of a barrier guarding the entrance.

"Stay where you are!" she commanded. Misty and Brock put their arms up, dropping Ash. "I'm not arresting you. I'm warning you to stay away."

They put their arms down. "Stay away?" Misty repeated.

"This area is quarantined. A strange Jynx has been wandering the area, kissing people and causing inebriation. The city's filled with trainers who've been affected."

"_Hic! _Hey, Zhenny," said a trainer behind her. One of the Growlithe shot a Flamethrower at her feet and she stumbled backwards. "_Hic! _Sheesh. What _hic!_ a groush," she muttered as she stumbled away.

Jenny continued, "Right now, we're looking for this Jynx and a cure."

"I gotta _hic!_ get thish shity'sh _hic!_ badge," protested Ash as he got to his feet.

"Yeah, no," said Misty. "Not in your condition."

"She's right," agreed Officer Jenny. "Besides, you wouldn't be able to even if you wanted to. Jazmine's been affected, too."

Nobody noticed a Lovely Kiss attack approaching Jenny from behind. It hit her before the Growlithe could react. Jenny stumbled and slurred, "I'm an offisher _HUP! _of the law. You...You kidzh be good _hup!_ now, okay? I'm going to bed. Night, night. _HUP!_" She laid on the ground.

"Well, if the helmet was for protection in this case, it did nothing," said Misty.

"We can't just leave her there," said Brock. "Let's bring her to the Pokemon Center." He turned to Jenny's Growlithe and requested, "Can we count on you to lead us there?"

The Growlithe nodded and waited for Brock and Misty to pick Jenny up. They led the way with Ash stumbling behind.

Singulto watched atop a tree branch as trainers and locals sat around, laughing, talking nonsense, and hiccuping around the city. "Whatever is in that MooMoo Milk has created this drunken revelry and strengthened the spell. I've never seen it last this long from one drink before, let alone spread like wildfire." The tree shook for a moment and Singulto looked down to see an inebriated Mr. Mime dancing around. "It's even affecting some of the Pokemon around here. Interesting."

Ash and friends entered the Pokemon Center and saw multiple trainers asleep on chairs, benches, and tables. Nurse Joy was at her desk wearing a helmet. "Hello, welcome to…" she stopped when she saw them carrying Officer Jenny, who was hiccuping in her sleep. "I see the helmets do nothing. Whatever. They're rather uncomfortable, anyway." She took her helmet off and came over to help Misty and Brock with carrying Jenny to a bench. "She'll be fine. Let her sleep."

Chansey came over to Nurse Joy and pointed in the direction of the desk. The video phone was ringing. She walked over and answered to the inebriated Joy from earlier. "_HICCUP! _Hello, Zhoy!" she greeted.

"Hi, Joy, did you find out anything?"

"Yesh! The source _huck!_ is from a Mil...Mil…" she slapped herself to focus. "a Miltank. _Hup!_"

Nurse Joy rolled her eyes, "Yes, Joy, you told me that hours ago. Anything else?"

The inebriated Joy rubbed her chin in thought, "Nohsing we can idenfitie. _HICCUP!_"

"Real helpful," Nurse Joy sighed. "Call me when you have something, okay?" She ended the call and got up. "I'm gonna go investigate this myself. Chansey, watch Jenny." Chansey saluted and stood by Jenny.

After Nurse Joy left, Misty grabbed her bag. "I'm gonna get some supplies."

"Be careful," warned Brock.

As Misty stepped outside, she saw Joy face to face with the Jynx. They both stared at each other, unmoving, with Joy's left hand near a pokeball at her waist. Misty was about to creep away before Joy stopped her, whispering, "Don't move!"

The Jynx's bloodshot eyes shifted toward Misty and back to Joy. It shot a Sweet Kiss in Misty's direction. Wasting no time, Joy jumped in the way and threw her pokeball. The Sweet Kiss landed and Jynx launched another before the pokeball hit. The Sweet Kiss hit Misty right after the pokeball captured Jynx. It wiggled a couple of times before beeping, indicating that the capture was successful.

"Woohooo! _Hiccup! _You caught it! _Hiccup!_" cheered a drunken Misty.

"I shure did. _Huck!_" slurred Joy, clumsily getting up and retrieving the pokeball.

Later that night, the effects of the enchanted MooMoo Milk were starting to wear off on most of the trainers and locals. The ones that were hit more recently were still in an inebriated state.

Ash woke up and Misty told him what happened, to the best of her ability, "The whole shity _hic! _wazh affected. We carried you _hic!_ to the Pokemon Shenter. _Hic! _Jenny was down. _Hic!_ All seemed losht until...until..._hic!_...Nursh Joy shaved the day. _Hiccup!_ She toshed the pokebawl," Misty clumsily imitated the throw and nearly fell over. "Wooosh! _Hic! _After the shmoke cleared, _hic! _Jynx was caught! _HICCUP!_"

"That's great, Misty," Ash groaned, holding an ice pack to his head.

"_HICCUP!_" Misty smiled and sat down. "_Hiccup! Hiccup!_"

Brock smiled and nodded, "At least things are back to normal."

Officer Jennys and sober citizens were outside gathering those still affected and helped them get back to their homes. During this, no one noticed a pair of Togetic staggering around and flying off to nearby cities.


End file.
